by Jim Condon
What a break for the INFORMER. It scooped all the other supermarket tabloids the first time Elvis Presley and Amelia Earhart ever met. What a break for me, too. I would have missed out on this romance of the century if I didn't always thumb through the INFORMER while waiting for checkout. Just listen to this.
An INFORMER exclusive: The King and Amelia, queen of the skies in the 1930s, turn the night temperature up several degrees with a hot and heavy act at Hollywood's trendy club, Roxbury. The couple, both known for their visits from the other side, kiss, hug, cuddle and ignore hundreds of other partygoers until early morning.
"I don't think they knew each other before," says an insider. They arrived separately, she in leather night jacket, he in blue suede shoes. "This has gotta be the boy-meets-girl event of all eternity."
Several weeks later:
ELVIS GOES FOR FACELIFT TO WIN BACK AVIATRIX
Boy loses girl. The aging Elvis, 60, has fallen so hard for 97-year-old aviation pioneer Amelia Earhart that he's having plastic surgery. He hopes it will lure her back from an unidentified young male model. Will it work? Asked for her reaction, Amelia evasively replies "Elvis is due for a complete overhaul." And finally:
ELVIS AND AMELIA TIE KNOT IN QIUICKIE LAS VEGAS WEDDING
Falls go wild with questions on learning Elvis checked into his Las Vegas hotel room with Amelia Earhart. Will he perform onstage with Amelia looking on adoringly from ringside? Is Amclia planning another of her well-publicized flights? Nothing like that, according to the recently facelifted Elvis: "We got hitched last night at the Love Me Tender Wedding Chapel."
But why not a grand wedding at Graceland, fans beseech them. "Too much fuss at our age," Amelia answers demurely. "Besides, I think I'm pregnant." Remember, there's a first time for everything and the INFORMER brings it to you first.