NEW!

"He has some tongue."
"...?!"
"I meant to say he has some tongue action."
-Ash

"He's a porkbun wife-beater!"
-Q

"You're a cow!"
-K

"He's gonna betray you. Baby cows on your farm will go missing becuz he's making sushi with them."
"Beef sushi?! He would never do that!"
"Ask! Who will betray her?"
*Card lands on sushi chef*
"See?! He's gonna betray you and make beef sushi!"
"NOOOOOOO! COWS!!!!"
(I hope this makes no sense to you)

ALL THE OTHER QUOTES!

"cool in a not cool way"
-QP on spina bifida

"WHY AM I BALD?!"
-Ash on a portrait drawn by QP

"Ha ha! Booze!"
-QP on stickers (that's right)

"Deer don't eat rabbits?!"
-Ash

"Run princess boy, RUN!"
-QP to Jason

"I don't speak your language."
-Ash

"hehehe...the bald Katie..."
-Ash

One day at lunch...
Everyone at the table got either a lollypop or Smarties...
K: Ha ha! You three are SUCKERS and I'm a SMARTIE!!
QP&GG: ...
Ash: ...What do you mean by that?

GG: Tell me a story!
K: Well, once, long ago, there was this icecream in the deser--
Ash&QP: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

"Ash, pet Q's mind."
"Hee, I already am!"

"There's nothing more cliche than burning pastel-colored panda bears."
-Mr. Biggs one day in Graphic Arts class

"Yes! Me and Orlando will skip down the halls singing 'Tirra Lirra!'"
-a quote from me, forever saved in Angela's book of quotes

"AHH! My bloodpressure!!"
-Ash

"Don't hurt me!"
"Yeah, I am!"
-during the giant foam finger fight

"Dobby is named Dobby because of Dobby."
-Q explains the origin of Dobby's name

"Stop insulting Q's genetics!"
-creative writing class

"This isn't poke-and-go!"
-Q

"Spiral!"
-Q

"Get me out of here."
-Johns response to the above Q quote

A phone call with Ash:
"AHHHHHHHHHHHH!" *click*

"Maybe I'm just playing with your mind!"
-Ash (who else?)

"Shut up, white boy!"
-Sidni, during a ROAR meeting

"She's not ready yet."
-Strings class~

*Raise You're Voice*
-A Joke Within Itself

SPECIAL EDITION GG QUOTES!

"mmm~guy."

"Evil Begone!"

"Well, you're all cursed!"

"kanninchen sind suess"
-good P (The Good Philip)

"go porkbun go"
-Q

"hahaha apparantly i'm uptight!"
-A

"who are you? philly cheese steak?"
-A

"who are you? Ibnophil?"
-A

"this sucks i'm being too wordy."
-A

"I just got out from the mental institution."
-A

"WAFFLE."
-A

"Chanting in the distance.... namiki! namiki! Namiki! NAmiki! NAMiki! NAMIki! NAMIKi! NAMIKI!!!"
-A

*dances like nobody's watching*
-Phil

"NEVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR ...ahem nice shoes... VERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR"
-U/no/no (aka Phil)

"I HATE MYSELF!"
-green

"mr or miss green, it is not good for you to hate yourself- I already like you and i don't know who you are."
-GG

"IMPERSONATORS! I WILL DEVOUR YOUR SOULS AND RAVAGE YOUR FLESH FOR ALL OF ETERNITY!"
-green

"my dear friend green- please don't devour my soul- i don't think that would be very nice."
-GG

"Ich Hasse Mich! Das ist gut!"
(tanslation: I hate myself! This is good!)
-green

"who are all these weird People ? -_- you suck Green!"
-A

"hahaha Green, you suck double much!"
-A

"Two bars of soap!! Two!!"

"And Hitler was a filter filter filter filter...."

"Who were some of the other losers?"
"You."
"I walked right into that one, didn't I?"

"Why are you talking about me?!"
"Ok, paranoid girl..."

"And they were stoned on maple sruyp..."

"So, how does something like that happen?"
"Magic?"
"Magic, yeah, thanks tinkerbell."

"Hehe...hey, welcome to Ohio, sucker!"

"So who were the big whigs--god that was awful."

"That question should burn!"

"Don't know what that noise is...sounds like the voices of millions of oppressed people...oh well..."

"One guy vs. ten cows. Cows win."

*someone outside screams*
"Um, is everything ok out there?"
"...No. But don't worry about it..."

A few minutes later...
*someone outside screams again*
"Gawd! How long does it take to kill someone?!"

"Don't fall in the molten metal, it burns."

"And then there were the wage laborers up north, chopping up cows...stuffing them in cans."

"Jeremiah is being signed out."
"Don't gloat, just go."
*leaves*

"If we add up all the letters it equals the square root of 8!"

"Spiny blade things of doom!"

"Down with tractors!"

SEXIST WILLIAM QUOTES!

"What do you think about this quote?"
"I think it delayed women's rights."

"What is the 'new women' like?"
"More like a man?"

"What can the 'new woman' do that the man can't?"
"She can COOK!"

"...ok...ladies, feel free to club him like a baby seal."
*gasp*
"...no, that was wrong. The baby seal part was wrong, not the part about beating him."

"Elves are cool, man."
-Orlando Bloom

(One day on Law & Order)
CSI: The dead guy's legs are broken, and he's got windshield glass on his shirt.
Det. Green: So, you're saying he was hit by a car?
CSI: Yeah.
Det. Briscoe: And you thought you were feeling run down.

"The guy's a boil on the butt of humanity!"
-guy on L&O

"Get off...the nuclear...warhead"
-Armageddon

"Leave him alone, he's just an idiot!"
-Kyo talking about the student body pres on FB

"All right, then, I'll go to hell!"
-Huck Finn, when he decides to help runaway slave Jim, even though it means he'll "go to hell"

"I've learned a lot about religion from you."
-Balian (Orlando Bloom) to the bad priest in Kingdom of Heaven

"Pain heals. Chicks dig scars."
-Shane Falco (Keanu Reeves) in The Replacements

"You're so ugly, that if uglyness were bricks, you'd be the Great Wall of China! MWHAHAHAHAHA!"
-The guy in the Geico commercial (he saved a load of money, too)

On an episode of COPS, a prison wardon was talking to some of the inmates...
Wardon:"Hablas español."
Inmate: "....I'm Indian."

"Now I have to arrest my girlfriend for conspiracy and attempted murder...she'll probably break-up with me..."
-Randy, on a episode of Monk

"How come everytime I take you kids to the mall, it burns to the ground?"
"Hmm...I blame the economy."
-Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy

"I couldn't hear anything this time except for crickets. Just crickets chirping in the hibiscus. Nothing wrong with crickets. Crickets are our friends."
-Suze, from Mediator

But anyway, there he was, after I'd told him very politely not to come around for a while, looking all manly and hot and everything in the nineteeth-century outlaw outfit he always wears. You know the kind: with those tight black pants and the white shirt open down to there...
-Mediator

"Morgan? That's a sexy name."
-The Lake House

(IM w/ Scotty)
Scotty: i can shoot ur HW for you
Me: yeah! do it
Scotty: ok
Scotty: *pop*

(IM w/ Mel)
"i gotta go watch TV with my dog before she dies of a heartattack."
"yes, dogs do need lots of tv."

(IM w/ Phil)
Phil: ohh sorry
Phil: i was just looking at your profile
Phil: mine is just blah
Me: yes
Me: it is
Phil: thanks

(IM w/ Phil)
me: *philip bursts into flames*
me: lost another one
phil: haha ahhh burning
me: don't laugh while u burn to death!
phil: this is cool
phil: im like a torch
me: just die

(IM w/ Phil)
me: *throws self off cliff*
phil: ahhhhhh
me: i can't take it anymoooooooooooorrreeeeeeee------
phil: no stop the madnesss
phil: whoa
phil: she can yell a long time
me: ...
me: i die and that's all u can say?!