Key to Life

This is a continuation of the last KTL article I presented.

Now as to what Biblical submission is: I see four concepts in the idea of submission: Obedience, Respect, Affirmation, and love. So, let us begin with the real controversial one, obedience. Lets read Titus 2:4 - 5 "that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, {5} to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed."

So many women today want the obedient taken out of the marriage vows, but as we can plainly see, it is a Biblical concept.

A tyrannical husband demanded that his wife conform to rigid standards of his choosing. She was to do certain things for him as a wife, mother, and homemaker. In time she came to hate her husband as much as she hated his list of rules and regulations. Then, one day he died--mercifully as far as she was concerned. Some time later, she fell in love with another man and married him. She and her new husband lived on a perpetual honeymoon. Joyfully, she devoted herself to his happiness and welfare. One day she ran across one of the sheets of do's and don'ts her first husband had written for her. To her amazement she found that she was doing for her second husband all the things her first husband had demanded of her, even though her new husband had never once suggested them. She did them as an expression of her love for him and her desire to please him.

The whole idea of Biblical obedience must be tempered with love. Matthew Henry wrote : "Eve was made by God not out of Adam’s head to rule over Him, nor out of His feet to be trampled upon by Him, but out of His side to be equal with Him, under His arm to be protected, and near His heart to be loved."

The next concept is Respect, in Ephesians 5:33 we find that a wife is to respect her husband, "Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband."

A husband gave his wife a beautiful skunk coat beside a Christmas tree. When his wife opened it up she said, "I can't see how such a nice coat can come from such a foul smelling little beast." The husband said, "I don't ask for thanks, but I do demand respect."

What can I say about respect? Respect means such things as approval, honor, acceptance, and admiration. Respect means not fighting in public and sarcastic remarks are a no no. Respect means treating the individual with dignity.

The next concept mirrors respect and its affirmation. Everyone needs affirmation. To know that they are accepted as God created them and appreciated for the things they do. I have a book that I have been studying by a woman who is an anthropologist. She has studied primitive cultures and modern cultures and is presently involved with counseling and marriage seminars. She points out that husbands do many things for their wives and families that are rarely noticed or appreciated: Maintaining things in the home such as appliances, maintaining the lawn and garden and seeing that the cars are properly maintained.

And yet, wives and children often complain that husband and father do little to nothing to help around the house. He rarely says anything, but wonders why he does what he does not receiving any appreciation. He works all day, five days a week, and brings home a piece of paper

Its not like it once was, when he was successful as a hunter, he carried home a large slab of meat and his family knew they would survive.

But, today, we rarely even see the paycheck, and its effect is taken for granted. The husband needs the affirmation of his family that he has contributed to their survival.

The last concept we shall add is love. I refer to Titus 2:4 -5, "that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed."

The Greek word translated love, here, admonish the young women to love their husbands is not agape, this time it is the word Phileo, which is the root for brotherly love or friendship.

A wife’s responsibility is to be a friend to her husband. There are so many things we could say about the concept of friendship but two will do: Friendship includes loyalty and holding on to the honor of trust. What do I mean by holding on to the honor of trust? Your spouse has honored you by giving you trust, to hold on to the honor of trust means never betraying that trust. That trust is given in many areas of life: Physical, Emotional and spiritual.

In Conclusion. I hope we have adequately covered the Biblical concepts of headship and submission. Each is a God given responsibility. Husbands will stand before God and answer for his execution of his responsibility and wives will stand before God and answer for the execution of her responsibility.