NO Review, the blog - 2010
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December 5, 2010
I've been gone. Mentally.
Emotionally. I don't know if I'm back yet, but this is an
attempt. It's been hard, and it doesn't feel like it was supposed
to be so difficult, or at least: it feels like if I only did all the
right things I wouldn't feel this way. I've read a bunch of
things written about repatriation and the bumps to expect. A lot
of the articles contain a list of suggestions for making things better,
or at least correlations that point towards better and quicker
stability and reintegration. I don't think I've deliberately
ignored them, and perhaps I'm just bearing witness to their truth, but
it certainly seems that I'm not doing what I need to shorten the
process. I know I'm not cutting myself enough slack because I'm
always too critical of myself and often drastically overestimate how
much is possible for me or anyone to do in a given period of
time. But. I do believe there is room for, if not
recrimination, then improvement. I can start doing the things
that make me feel better. I can talk to people. I can
run. I can write. I can garden. None of which I've
been doing. I started working in the yard on Friday and
yesterday. Took the dog for a long walk/run yesterday. Here
it is early Sunday morning and I'm writing. It goes.
It is December and that means the advent calendar in
our house. Traditionally, that means an activity each day, tucked
in with a small treat. We're already dreadfully behind in getting
the activities done - our Christmas picture taken, the house decorated,
the snowflakes up, and the lights up. I don't remember what
happened when I was a kid; whether we ever got behind, whether the
activities were smaller ones, if it mattered to me if they didn't
happen. I remember I was never as busy with outside of the house
activities as my own kids are. I remember melting mom's red wax
carved Mother and Child because it had a wick and getting in trouble on
the "Let's light all the Christmas candles" day. I know we never
moved house as a kid. I've talked to my kids and they promise to
let me know when it IS important that the be included in the activity,
but that often they just want it to happen, and they are okay with
choosing to make a mini skate park out of Lego instead of doing
something more holiday-related. And I know they need the time to
play together and they aren't getting enough of "just playing" time,
what with school, homework and (speed stacking, science club,
gymnastics, unicycling, Scouts, board game club, and soccer). But
I still am reining myself in, thinking ooh - wouldn't it be cool if
they could make a Dutch surprise
this year - they could shop with me individually with $5 and I could do
the paper maché while they wrote the poem - all by...
tomorrow? Ha! Not this year, perhaps. Or at least not
on time this year.
I am still unpacking. There are still 4-5
boxes that may still contain my dish drainer. Getting thoroughly
unpacked quickly is supposed to be helpful, and those who get their
pictures re-hung within a month do better. I'd like to be there,
but I'm not. Our garage is stuffed with empty boxes. We
haven't gotten to the point of getting rid of the piles of things we
want to get rid of. It takes time to do it right and my first
priority is getting the things organized that we DON'T want to get rid
of. It will happen, but everything is slow. Everything is
slow.
My avoidance drug of choice has been books.
Lots of them. Libraries are great, but sometimes evil too.
And I've never been a moderate reader, so that doesn't help
either. I have liked Jen's practice of blogging her books read so
I started my own list dating from my return to the States in
August. I'm at 54 novels since then, and I probably missed a few
somewhere.
November saw me catch up to C in age again.
Along the way I figured out that I hope to reach about 30 different
prime numbers in my life. And I had another kind of birth day
celebration as B (and my mamahood) reached ten.
It has been the kids (and C to a lesser extent
because he's an adult and away at work more often) that have kept me
from disappearing completely. I have had to oversee homework,
navigate to the bus or school, cart to practices, fix dinners and
breakfasts, prepare lunches, prod them into pajamas, read stories, and
do laundry. I'm glad they've been there for me. They are my
boys and I adore them.
November was also the official national novel
writing month. I hate November as a time to sit down and write
50,000 words, but all the support and encouragement and swag is geared
around that month, and even though I knew this November in particular
was going to be a rough one, some small part of me still felt like I
should attempt it, and a larger part felt a bit guilty for not
participating (especially since my non-participation went so far as to
not write a word).
We had a nice Thanksgiving with family, and we've
managed to clean the house at least once a month for game nights.
We decorated for Halloween, hung our fall leaves, and have all the
boxes of Christmas decorations out ready to go. The boys had good
seasons, but wanted to continue soccer during the winter, so are in an
indoor league now. A is "playing up" on B's age-level team and we
have games on Sundays across town through the winter.
I hope, always, to do more, do better. It's
better than not hoping anyway.
September 20, 2010
Whew. I'm getting stuff done, but it feels
slow. It is slow. Today I got out all of the "board game"
boxes from the garage and emptied them into our cupboards. Five
big boxes, and it doesn't even include the ones we brought with us for
three years. There were some puzzles and toys mixed in, but there
are a lot of games we have. Not all of the games are ones we
should keep, but we should test them out first and see if they work for
any of us. Add in the ones that I bought from a friend paring
down his huge collection (including a duplicate of at least one I just
unpacked), and the ones my mom brought over from my childhood, and
we've got plenty for game night on Saturday. I also found another
kitchen box, but it didn't have the dish drainer or box grater in it,
so I suspect they are still in a box in the garage somewhere. And
I investigated an unlabeled box, but since it was garden tools,
planters, and our croquet set, I just labeled it and put it back in the
garage.
The laurel hedge is slowly taking shape. My
plan is to cut it back vertically to the first leaf and hope that it
sprouts further inside so that we can cut it further back next season,
and also cut it off horizontally at a level we can reach from the
ladder. We fill the yard waste container every week, and though
we are clearly making a difference, there is still a lot of hedge to
cut.
I did make blackberry jelly (and cleaned up the
major spill of hot blackberries I created when pouring into an unstable
cheesecloth and sieve contraption I'd devised). The pears are
done. The larder is starting to get re-stocked. Still, it
won't be until fall is over and I have drained jack-o-lanterns in the
freezer and applesauce canned that I will feel somewhat ready for
winter.
I have tried to be somewhat slow at volunteering at
the school. I helped out in the library last week, but find that
my history of both being in charge of a library and being paid have put
a damper on how many hours I really want to spend there. I also
don't think this librarian will be reading to the kids in the same ways
that the previous librarian did, and since I had been looking forward
to following along, and I don't think it will be happening, there's yet
another reason to find other things to do with my time. I'll show
up for a bit on Thursday or Friday mornings. And I'll be in B's
classroom on Fridays after drop off. I did end up volunteering to
be the afterschool Club Coordinator. Somewhat swayed by the idea
of getting closer to our resident Hugo winners, and getting an early
peek at what's available that my kids might be interested in, I said
yes to the soft sell. Being known by the current parent powers
that be has its advantages for someone looking to find a place for
herself in the new/old school.
I know that making a menu is crucial for our dinner
success (and mood) in the evenings, and I finally made one. I'm
still finding my kitchen lacks certain ingredients that make planning
ahead and checking recipes necessary too. This evening I started
the list of things I'd like the new remodeled kitchen to fix or
include. We thought originally that we could get started on the
kitchen remodel project before our sea shipment arrived, but since our
things are due in port this coming Saturday (and then go through
customs, et cetera), that's not going to be possible. The mess
and inconvenience of cooking creatively in another room will be worth
it though. I feel as though the kitchen is the heart of a home,
and I want mine to be healthier than it is now- the flow's not right
yet.
The kids are at gymnastics now and should be
finishing up soon. It's been a good day. I hope it will be
a good week too.
September 15, 2010
Our stuff, our stuff has been sighted (kind of)! Our
sea shipment is due in port in 10 days, and then goes through customs
(which may well take as long). Must continue clearing the decks...
September 14, 2010
Grocery shopping fails for yesterday: wrong size
coffee filter pads, cayenne when I meant to get paprika, and worst of
all: a gallon of 2%/half-vol instead of non-fat milk! Eeeuuyuk! My
first thought was that it was spoiled, but it smelled okay. Sigh. At
least I have a huge refrigerator.
September 11,
2010
I have a lot to say about where and how things have
been,
especially the last week, and a character limited place to talk isn't
the forum. Facebook can't serve me well right now. It has,
however,
been highlighting how the trivial and the life shaking exists at the
same time, and this is true not only in different lives but in one's
own too.
C arrived a week ago today, and started work on
Tuesday after Labor Day. Tragically, his new boss, who was a
Dutch expat here in the US, was hiking on Sunday and collapsed.
His wife performed CPR while his kids went for the ranger, and he was
transported to the hospital where he never regained
consciousness. He was taken off life support and died on
Thursday. Not only is this completely horrid to contemplate
happening, but it is hard in stupid and inconvenient ways. It's
so difficult to complain about the small stuff when something like this
happens even though the small stuff happens too. Of course, work
has been absorbed with other things than settling benefits and job
descriptions/possibilities for C. He's going to have to put
himself forward to make the vision he and his boss had for his position
to come into being.
The kids now have three days of school under their
belts. It has been weird for me. The kids clearly had
schedules and rules to follow, and I didn't. We are at the same
school we were when we left three years ago, and many of the faces are
familiar. I've had people certain that I was only gone last year,
many moms whose kids I know by name (but not them), and lots of the
same qauestions repeatedly asked of me. A is in a third grade
class that containes two other kids who have recent world travel
experiences too - one trekked around the world since October spending
at most a month in one place, and one spent the last two years on a
boat with his family across and in the Pacific ocean. In B's
classroom, one of his good friends is headed to the Netherlands with
his family at the end of October for an indeterminate amount of
time. It has been interesting to discover how many conversations
end not with "what a great opportunity; that would be great," but with
their recounting their own experiences living abroad as children or
adults. I still want to find an expat or repat group, but I am
certainly not as alone as I'd anticipated in this world.
I am finding it all too easy to slip into the
impression I made years ago, when that is not what I want to do.
We are in the same house, and though determined to make changes to it
(remodeled kitchen, bath and deck), we are putting ourselves in the
house in the same ways we did before. I want to fit
differently. I am wary of feeling stifled or stuck, but unsure
how to keep that from happening.
B has a teacher who was very strict the first
day. He came home and cried about how many RULES there were, and
worried that he wouldn't have any fun for the rest of the year. I
tried to reassure him and encouraged him to give her some more
chances. Given some of his comments, I'm certain that he was also
missing his friends and his teacher Mr J from last year. Even two
more days of school has helped show him that he won't be miserable just
because the classroom is more structured. It is A's turn to have
a male teacher, and he is finding school fun. I think it will be
a good year for both boys.
I canned peaches with my mom when she was here the
second time, and we bought pears to can as well. I waited a bit
too long to start canning them, and am getting less than the whole pear
out of them. It is so much more pleasurable to can with someone
else! I ran out of jars and had to buy some more, despite having
plenty more on the boat or with family in Spokane. I can wait to
can applesauce until we get our stuff later this fall (October some
time), but neither peaches nor pears will wait.
My niece was staying with us for a while before she
could move in to her college digs, but I didn't get to cook wheatless
for her very much as she was out with her friends/boyfriend or job
interviewing or in Spokane most of the time she was around.
Still, it's nice to have her so nearby and I'm looking forward to
stocking my house with gluten-free cornflakes and soy sauce.
The cultural stuff has been different than I
anticipated. It's much easier to be here than I had thought it
was going to be. I was thinking it was going to be a new country
in some ways, and it really doesn't feel like it. Though I am not
yet used to anticipating the correct amount of traffic and delay, I am
slowly getting back my knowledge of how best/fastest to get to where I
want to go. It's so familiar. I am appreciating the ways
that the Dutch did some things differently. For instance, it is
nice to have a big refrigerator with gallons of milk in it. But a
gallon takes up so much more space when it is close to empty than a
liter carton does.
It was way too easy to slip back into the car
culture, especially
before the kids had bikes. We got them bikes with gears just
before school started, and they are doing very well on them.
There is a major hill between school and our house (mostly downhill to
school and uphill back home). They have mastered the hand brakes
(even in rain) and using gears. B is rightfully frustrated with
his bike because it doesn't easily shift into first, but we should be
able to fix that for him. Because we had just one car, which went
with C to work, we did all of our soccer practices and school trips by
bike. But it certainly feels more dangerous to be on the roads in
Seattle than in Holland, and not just because of the hills. Cars
don't expect us. We are not expected to use bikes (ours were the
only bikes locked up on the rainy first day of school - in a school of
hundreds). I had one driver slow down and call out the window at
me as we were slogging up the hill: "You let your kids ride on the
street like that?!" Apparently, despite it being the law to use
the streets rather than the sidewalks, we (or they, I guess) should be
using the sidewalks to cycle. Of course, much of the route
doesn't have even sidewalks, so that isn't really a workable solution
either. I suspect they will be using the bus when the weather
gets too nasty, even though we do (as of an hour ago) have a second car
now. Speaking of now, I am getting completely chewed on by
mosquitoes as my boys and the two kids I'm watching play with a Frisbee
and a soccer ball in a tennis court. Time to switch with C.
The boys have gymnastics on Monday evenings and a
soccer event of one boy's or another on five of the other seven days of
the week. Currently, two activities leave only one day with
nothing planned (Thursday), and no after-school clubs have started
yet! I'm glad that the soccer season wraps up in two months; a
game on Saturday for A and Sunday for B throughout the winter would
make it incredibly difficult to get us up on the slopes this winter!
We have all of the things we are going to have until
our main sea shipment makes it to us. That means our luggage
(mainly clothes, plus laptops), our air shipment (250 pounds including
bike helmets, essential garden and kitchen tools, the Wii, and more
clothing), and the stuff that was in storage (about 220 "boxes").
I have unpacked all of the kitchen boxes and retrieved all of our
kitchen appliances, from toaster and mixer to waffle iron and chocolate
fountain. I think there must be some drift in labeling, however,
because I still don't have our dish drainer or the box grater I
remember. This is the ideal time not only to make decisions about
what should really go back into our house, but also to do an accurate
inventory. So, as boxes get unpacked, I log them in too.
Moving forward, C wants to unpack whichever box is next in the stack to
minimize box handling, while I would prefer to unpack all of a room at
a time so that we can find some of the things we are searching for.
I'm still underestimating how long all of my
activities will take, and am looking forward to the mythical day when I
won't have anything pressing on me to do, so that I can spend some time
exploring what I want to do. Clearly, I need to build that in to
the rest of my day's activities. I fell prey to three books left
here by my niece and brother, and have put the release of the fourth
book into my calendar. I was successful at stopping partway
through the first book the first evening I started reading, but then
pretty much read straight through the rest. I seem physically
incapable of reading just a little at a time. Sometimes I wish I
was able to fall asleep in the middle of a book so I wouldn't end up
creeping to bed at 4:30 in the morning of a school night after
finishing the book. C says he has a couple of books I was
interested in on his Kindle. Perhaps it would work to have the
book in someone else's hands, but I fear I would end up keeping him up
later than he wants to be instead of going to bed at a reasonable
time. Or maybe I just schedule a couple of days a month to read
like a maniac and not feel guilty about it.
In addition to unpacking and inventory work, I have
some more house stocking to do. We don't have many emergency
foods in the house yet (not foods for use in case of natural disaster,
but food to use when planning has gone awry and we're hungry and need
dinner five minutes ago). So, another trip to Costco is in order,
and I'll hit Trader Joe's when I take the kids to gymnastics on
Monday. Need to finish canning the pears (or salvage what I can
for pear bread). The house can use a good cleaning (again already
etc), and I really want to do more work towards getting our garden back
under control. There's so much work to do out there, and it feels
good to grub around. I'd like to glean some blackberries while
they're ripe and make some jelly too. The dog is healthy again
and could use some dog walks, and my body is crying out for runs
(rather than just steep hills to bike). And there are a bunch of
photos to deal with again, and to spend time struggling with Photoshop
Elements so as not to lose the tagging of 10,000 pictures. So,
you know, the usual.
Okay. Both cars are home now, and both boys
asleep. Time for me to follow suit. ... Oh. Or
craft a reply to a dear friend's e-mail for an hour and a half.
Now to bed. I'll publish later.
August 21,
2010
Spent Thursday all day cleaning, receiving the
rental furniture (hooray), and going to Costco for dinner and a
stock-up run. Finally felt like a house. Pets appreciated
having us sleep here too.
Yesterday was more cleaning and organizing, getting
US customs forms filled out, and getting the dog to the vet. He
picked up kennel cough while we were packing up the Dutch house, some
strain he wasn't vaccinated against. Now he's on antibiotics and
a cough suppressant. I also realized he's not 14 but 13, so
somehow he seems younger and more able to successfully beat this back.
Today we have a BBQ to go to, my mom leaves, the
kids get a playdate, and C's best man and family arrive. The
garage needs some work before our storage shipment arrives Monday
morning. More to do!
August 19, 2010
Ha! Reading what I wrote just nine days ago
makes me go all rye. What a long strange trip it has been.
I am writing from a hotel room in Seattle early in
the morning. The kids are still sleeping and my mom, who is here
doing some serious helping out, is downstairs after going in search of
something hot to drink an hour and a half ago. It is six am.
Since we arrived at our house: Many things
that were supposed to happen didn't. Many things that weren't
supposed to happen did. There are some fortunate confluences
there, but mostly I feel entitled to be grumpy.
I spent much of last week washing walls and getting
the house to look great empty. I cleared out whole levels, making
the areas that Charles needed to enter for any reason smaller. I
got rid of things like our metal recycling, gave away the tape rolls
(and seriously sturdy cardboard tubes, and most of the plastic cartons)
to a teacher, and piled the paper and plastic recycling high. I
packed everything Charles wasn't going to pack himself, or get rid of,
and grabbed a few pictures of windmills on the way to the
airport. I did well, and felt proud of myself.
Our flight was long, especially since it was our
first experience flying ten and a half hours west without personal
viewscreens. The kids have both sworn off Delta as a
result. Blessings to whoever made the decision to offer free wifi
at Seatac airport, though, because my phone not only was out of
battery, but is (still) unable to call C in the Netherlands. We
got our rental car, loaded it to the brim with our 4 bags, 4 carry-ons,
2 kids plus booster seats, and me, and drove to our friend's
house. Great to see them again. I stayed up too late
watching Casablanca for the first time (I know, I know!) and headed to
bed after 29 hours, only to be awakened four hours later by A at 3:23,
followed shortly thereafter by B at 4:00. I made them and myself
try to go back to sleep until 5:15, unsuccessfully, and then we headed
off to our house.
From a conversation I'd had with my mom, I half
expected her to be asleep in our driveway, but she was 3 hours away
still, so we went to breakfast by ourselves, then came back to the
house to wait arrivals. We got to see my niece and sister-in-law
before they headed east, and mom arrived later in the morning, allowing
me to head to the grocery store for my first stocking-up run. The
cable guy came and installed internet, as expected. But I didn't
have any word on the rental furniture that was supposed to show up,
when the air freight was supposed to arrive, or arrangements on when
our stuff in storage was coming. By 2 pm, I started making phone
calls. By 4 pm I was borrowing a couple of air mattresses and
pillows. Time differences between the east coast, the NL, and the
west coast meant that I wasn't going to have any answers before the
morning, so we dined out and slept on air mattresses. Two of the
three mattresses leaked.
I haven't successfully slept past 4 am yet, though
the kids are adjusting well.
Tuesday morning the kids and I played a game of Life
(mom brought a bunch of my old games, in addition to my plants and
cleaning materials) while I worked on the computer and we waited for
mom to get up so we could go to breakfast. We hit the pet supply
store after breakfast in preparation for our pets' arrival. It
was just before they arrived that I realized that the little black bugs
that A had complained of, and the bites all over all of our legs, were
in fact a massive flea infestation in our house. By that time, we
had no movement on the rental furniture front except to confirm that
the ball had been dropped and the quote I was carrying around detailing
what was coming, was not attacted to any actual order, and that nothing
was in the works, and it would be a minimum of 48 hours after the order
was placed before we would receive anything. We booked a hotel.
So. Fleas. I'd never had fleas like this
before, so accepted advice and tried to determine what I needed to
do. The fleas in addition to discovering that our renters had cut
an ugly hole in our door to accommodate an electromagnetic cat door
that was bigger than our original cat flap, and not left any magnetic
keys to allow my cat inside, made me very grumpy at our tenants.
Wednesday morning I went to the house early and
vacuumed the entire house (gosh we have a lot of carpet! my old
muscle memory was kicking in, though, as I've vacuumed that carpet with
an almost identical vacuum many times before) while waiting for the pet
supply store to open. At 9 I went and read many labels on the
floor in the store, and decided that the four hour flea bomb made more
sense than the 24 hour carpet powder. Not only did I not have a
place to put the animals for 24 hours, our house is practically empty
and so long as I could manage to turn off the gas, it would be easiest
as well. After picking up mom and the kids from the hotel pool,
we spent all of the day getting ready to bomb, bombing, staying away
from, and airing out the house. We took the dog to a dog park,
and spent several hours at the library.
Yes, it was nice not to have rental furniture in the
house when we flea-bombed it. Yes, the kids have enjoyed the
hotel pool. But.
This is not how this week was supposed to go.
I am getting mighty tired of eating out. The pets are freaked out
and lonely; the dog might be sick. Can I really accommodate the
out of state visitors that are arriving the day after tomorrow?
And I have an entire house to clean this morning before the furniture
does actually arrive.
Seven o'clock. Time to shower and wake the
kids if moving around doesn't do the trick. Gotta get moving.
August 10, 2010
There really wasn't that little on my calendar after
all. At least so it seems looking back.
I'm in the throes of packers moving around me.
What was a home is now a cave with thick walls of cardboard, boxes
stacked high near the windows blocking out the light. They are
leaving to last what they think is important. The television, the
couch, the bed, the coffee cups. It is indeed nice to be able to
lounge on the couch and type, but while the team of three is outside
smoking and drinking coffee or gone for the day, I've been gathering
the empty rolls of tape because I know the kids will enjoy making some
sort of game from rolling them around or something similar.
Our air shipment has been moved to the truck.
We understood that it would go yesterday so that it could arrive next
week on Monday, the day after we arrived. Not sure that it will
be timely now. There was some confusion about was going and if we
were under the weight limit. I sacrificed my bike to the sea
shipment, which I am not completely pleased about, but am coming to
terms with it.
August 9, 2010
Movers arrived as I stepped out of the shower,
and I think I'm just about that much less ready than I'd like to be.
S'okay. It'll all work out. In a week I'll be in Seattle dealing with
all the stuff I didn't 3 years ago. Karmic.
July 28, 2010
Wow. The youngest is eight today! How'd we get so
old so fast?
July 26, 2010
Can't imagine having movers come today, as was the
original plan. I'm not ready. Hope I feel differently in two weeks when
they do come!
July 22, 2010
Third night in a row up very late/early with a
sleepless child. Last night I gave up at 4:30, while he was still
trying to go to sleep. Not sure if this is still related to jetlag, but
I'm very tired.
July 19, 2010
Suddenly I have a long stretch of time with only a
few things on the calendar. Need to get C healthy and get
organized for the move mid-August. This is in sharp contrast to
the last, oh let's say... year. We re-did our family leaving
calendar so as to include the three weeks tacked on to our stay because
of the injury, and it looked like a lot of empty space. I'm not
sure it really is, of course, but it felt like it today. Spent
most of the day doing very little, despite waking up at three
a.m. Made breakfast, snuggled, took a nap, did a bunch of
laundry, sorted through kids' shirts with them and found some to
donate, tried contacting parents for playdates with limited success,
made more dog treats (penultimate batch is in the oven now), emptied
the dishwasher twice, washed and brushed the dog, caught up a bit
electronically, walked 2.5 miles with the dog, made strawberry
shortcake, started downloading photos, started blogging...
Well crud. I don't know whether my trouble is
with my camera or the card, but I suspect the camera, since this isn't
the first card I've had trouble with. I'm definitely getting my
money's worth out of this photo recovery software. Recovering
wedding and vacation photos - one more thing on tomorrow's list, along
with figuring out a solution going forward.
We had a wonderful vacation. I have been
noticing quite often how happy I am, how glad I am I have the family I
do, how proud of my kids I am, how everything except C's injury is
very, very good. The wedding was lovely, and I got to dance as
much as I liked because B was on the floor for all but some of the slow
songs. He wasn't really dancing with me, but we both had fun, and
he showed off his rhythm and experimented with some moves. I
think once we teach him some swing and cha-cha, he'll be
irresistible. We got to spend some time with good friends just
hanging out and catching up. Everyone has grown so much, many
changes have completed changing. It was very good to be home
again.
Though it was very strange to be in our house.
I brought keys and talked to our agent. The kids played
forty-forty and hide and seek while I looked at everything and took
pictures. It felt a bit dirty and very empty. All the
things we'd like to do with the house clamored for an early start in my
head, and I opened closet doors and imagined fitting back into the
house and our life. One of the most noticeable changes was the
gardens. The renters didn't want the responsibility of gardening
so gardeners were hired. The question of do we want them back
another time before we move back in has been answered with a resounding
NO. Looked like nothing has been pruned in three years (if C were
healthy he'd be all over those many pruning projects, though I suspect
there will be enough to go around for quite some time to come), from
hedges to Japanese maples to young apple trees with long, overburdened
branches. Oy. Most troubling of all, however, was the
missing fruit. All of our raspberry bushes were gone, and half of
our strawberry plants (with sorry looking ones remaining fighting for
space with an overgrown bush). What happened? Chatting with
our neighbor, she mentioned how horrified she had been to see them take
a weed whacker to our garden and mow it all down, after all my hard
work. Not sure if that was the first summer we were gone or
repeatedly, but her comment helps me picture it. In future I
would like to put in more food-dense plants anyway, so am contemplating
changes with the pruning, but it feels like a giant step backwards to
have established fruit-producing plants ripped out or mowed down like
that.
I am looking forward to being home again, to
tackling projects from gardening to exploring the city like a tourist,
from resuming game nights to establishing movie nights to introduce my
kids to some of our favorites, from reserving books at the library to
setting up a working shop in our garage, from a new deck and kitchen to
finding new favorite spots in which to write.
It was initially very dizzying to be in a place
where strangers spoke English. Seems that if people were speaking
my language around me, nine times out of ten, I knew them by name or at
least face. Suddenly complete strangers were having conversations
around me! I kept mostly resisting the urge to turn around and
smile to show them I understood.
Tomorrow C goes to the physiotherapist we've both
seen in the past. A got scared by a cut scene in Guitar Hero
World Tour (Band Finale), and needs comforting...
July 15, 2010
I have been having lots of dreams / nightmares
lately in which I am missing something. Last night it was a party
I missed because I was doing a great job draining the water (even ten
minutes later I can't remember the logic or details as well as I can
remember the feelings, of course; it's a dream). I hate missing
things. I hate being late. I have spent hundreds of hours
of my life not sleeping because I wouldn't go to sleep if something was
going on around me and because I woke up when the first other person
got up. I like to be included.
The thing is, I know I AM missing a lot of
things. This whole expat experience is an exercise in missing
things. I miss farewell/leaving parties, family reunions,
birthdays, book clubs, dinner parties, weddings, baby milestones,
graduations, game nights.... I miss things by being on a
different continent, in a different time zone, on vacation, in
school. I miss things by being new, being overlooked, by having
weaker bonds to the person of honor, having other commitments, looking
busy with other things.
I am reminding myself that this is okay, even though
it often doesn't feel that way. I am making choices, and overall
I am pretty happy with those choices. Being an expat family was a
good experience for each of us. C needed us in France. I
spent time doing things I'm proud of. I have made some very good
friends, and some people will keep in touch with me only sporadically
in future. I remind myself I cannot be everyone's great friend,
that people are busy, that they are making good choices with their time
too.
I hope to remember all of this. I hope that I
have learned how it feels enough to treat the new members of my
communities with kindness and include them in what I can, or give them
reasons they understand, in case they are like me. I hope I
remember the good more than regretting the bad. I hope I have
learned enough to come to peace with it, though my dreams tell me this
is still in process.
Coming home to Seattle briefly and leaving C hurting
and on his own for his birthday in Hilversum today makes everything I
am missing more obvious. Here are tall kids, talking and walking
kids, prior commitments, changes at school, new stores, a strangely
different house. A and B are missing last playdates with friends
who are on vacation different dates than us. We are all missing
C's birthday. And most of all, I am missing him, my partner, my
friend, my mate, my home. Sigh. I'll be travelling back to
him in two days, and back with him in three. Can't wait.
Enjoying Seattle, though t'was strange to be in our
empty house again. I'm compiling lists of things we'll miss in the NL
and are looking forward to when we move back. They're both getting
long, even though Friends are a single entry on both.
July 11, 2010
What a wonderful wedding! Missed Charles like crazy,
but got to dance the whole night with B, who showed off some fancy
moves and his gift for rhythm. Once we teach him swing and cha cha,
he'll be irresistible.
July 9, 2010
Long day, but now in Vancouver with family for
tomorrow's wedding. Delta has MUCH improved in-flight movie selections
for kids (and adults), thank heavens, though it's possible the kids
wouldn't have stayed up til 3am if they had only me to entertain them.
Not looking forward to the new-3am wakeful children.
July 8, 2010
New (tentative, mais oui) plan! A,B&I go to
wedding as planned tomorrow, leaving C to heal and ask for help. Pack
up 9-11 August, then fly home, leaving a healed & driving C to
finish up work and rejoin us in Sept.
July 6, 2010
C is home and in bed, very sore. I'm going up to
join him. We'll tackle tomorrow after some sleep.
July 5, 2010
Oh curse. Special transport was arranged... ...to
the train
station. Scrambling. Don't know when we'll have internet again for an
update, sorry.
Kids and dog are asleep, cat is doing her cat
thing,
and I came
home safe to flowers and groceries and a clean house. So many friends
came to our rescue with offers and rides and prayers and extraordinary
kindnesses. Nothing like a crisis to illustrate how great people
can
be. Thank you.
July 4, 2010
Getting ready to travel back home from Marseille.
The kids and I go by plane Monday and C will arrive Tuesday by special
transport. We're just moving along figuring out what plans we can
salvage/modify/make as we go. As back breaks go, we're feeling pretty
fortunate, though that doesn't mean it's easy. Glad we came.
July 2, 2010
I was noticing earlier this week, how when you are
stressed or worried or dealing with a difficult situation, your sense
of curiosity goes away or turned down in volume. Where that road
goes, or what sort of construction they're doing in the middle of the
street? It's not that it becomes unimportant, because it never
really was important to you. It just becomes something you don't
have the time or energy or mental space to wonder about any more.
You just don't care. I wonder at the extent of that effect, and
how it might interact with children's learning, adults' behavior, or
the mentally ill. Guess I'm not so stressed any more, but
intrigued that I noticed it while it was happening. Humans are so
interesting.
Anyway, C is getting better. Stood up today,
and sat up a bunch of times. Would have walked, but dizziness
(from lying down for 5 days, and apparently an aftereffect of morphine)
made that too dangerous to try today. He'll do it tomorrow.
Things are slowly slotting into place in terms of plans. We still
don't have all of our questions answered, but at least the questions
still to answer are becoming clearer or moot. Don't know the
time-table of when he should be able to do what exactly. Don't
know still how this affects his work and his repatriation. Do
know how we will likely get back to Holland (ambulance car for C, plane
for AB&me). Do know some of the limits of what insurance will
pay (worldwide; US no different than NL or France). Have changed
some reservations, some still remain to change, and some others are
still in question. Our last European vacation is likely this one
though; Normandy beaches and Scotland will have to wait.
Boys and I went to the beach today after seeing
C. B asked, "There's a button for 'the closest beach'?" I
explained what I specifically did to our navigation system to get to
the short answer of "yes." I was able to find (and pay all of 3
euro for) a parking spot backed right up to the sand. It was a
very hot day made bearable by the constant wind from the water.
After sunscreening the kids, I got bored of sitting on our towel and
watching the kids cavort in the water, so stowed all of the valuables
in the car and grabbed a plastic bag to fill with trash. It felt
good to make myself useful, as I don't always feel that way at the
hospital. Even if, as A noted after helping me out for a while,
"it's endless!" At least I made a four bag-fulls of
difference. Oh, plus the plastic bumper strip from a car which
didn't fit in my bag, and someone's swimming trunks which I draped near
the garbage can. For the most part, I stood or walked in the surf
and plucked out broken plastic cups and hundreds of scraps of plastic
bags, with candy wrappers, lids, straws, and scraps of fabric thrown in
for good measure. A got a sock. I untangled a mess of
vegetation from the fishing line and plastic bags they had become
matted together with, at least enough to put in the garbage in a much
more dense-garbage state. I did a bit of combing the sand for
garbage too, but it was the water which was the most compelling because
the trash just kept coming. I have no idea if the state of the
beach is unusual for that beach, for Marseille, or for France in
general, or whether people just have learned to put up with it, but it
was intensely unpleasant to be in the water and have so much trash
brush up against me. I can't imagine any sealife being
happy. The kids had a great time, though.
We change hotels tomorrow because it's the first day
of France's vacation, and we couldn't get a single hotel for all five
nights we're here. Which means I should go to sleep so I can pack
peacefully tomorrow.
July 1, 2010
C's surgery went well yesterday, and he was starting
to move around in the bed a bit more. I expect to find out more today
once visiting hours start and we can see him.
June 30, 2010
What a day.
We're all four of us in Marseille now. C's
surgery went well, apparently, and I got to kiss a slightly drugged out
husband. The kids got to spend a little time with him, but aside
from questioning the nose tube of oxygen, saved most of their questions
until we were sitting down to a very late dinner and we were incurring
roaming charges. I wrote down their questions, though, so we
won't forget them.
I went to bed last night near midnight and set my
alarm for 4 am, figuring any decisions I made then about what really
needed to be done before I left would be closer to reasonable.
For some reason I ended up awake and dealing with pets at 3:15, so I
figured 4 would be possible. Blew right past it, though. I
guess I made a decision when I turned off my alarm, but should have
reset it at least. Woke up before six and did indeed let go of
doing some things before my trip since they were impossible at that
point. I spent a fair amount of time communicating with folks via
e-mail and FB. Texted C and got a reply, so the surgery wasn't as
early in the morning as I thought it. I remembered B's
orthodontist appointment in time to get ready for it and go, but
nothing was packed by then.
B got his braces off at 8:15, and a permanent
retainer put in. A permanent retainer turns out to be a small
wire glued to the back of his front four teeth, in the fifth closest to
the gums. The braces came off lickety split; she just went snap
snap snap, and the whole thing came out at once. The whole thing
was a bit of a surprise, actually, because at our visit last week to
get them off, they moved up to the heaviest wire instead and talked
about a non-permanent retainer instead. Nevertheless, his smile
is much less mettalic now.
Dropped the kids at school and gathered a collection
of shirts and a suit that the kids can wear to the wedding next
week. Worked out the details of our delivery to the train station
and the advisability of that instead of braving the construction-heavy
congested highways. Collected an additional number of well wishes
and hugs, and boogied home to get the necessary into suitcases and
instructions onto the table for the folks taking care of the house, cat
and dog.
So far I've realized I forgotten B's new stuffed
bunny he requested (he says it's fine, but I did remember his sports
blanket at the last minute), the French phrasebook C requested, and to
put out the treats that the dog gets in the morning and evening, the
ones I've been baking from scratch, the ones we have to spell and he
still seems to know what we're talking about. I hope that's
it. I remembered a lot of good things. I get points for
checking in and printing boarding passes, getting cash on the way to
our gate at the airport, apples and yogurt which tided us over to both
lunch and dinner, comic books, card games, and the TomTom power
cord. Anyway, I stuffed things in bags, and had almost completely
finished running around collecting the last bits before my ride
came. We grabbed B from his school and then collected A from the
school-wide water fight, changed and hauled butt to the station.
I bought our tickets and looked up just as our train rolled in, so I
hoofed two suitcases, my backpack and the computer/book bag under the
tracks and back up the stairs in time to get on the train just before
the whistle blew. It would have been fine to miss it, but the
train four minutes later isn't a stoptrein and so takes an additional
15 minutes. We all consumed an apple and the kids played Scribble
(that's the make the other person's scribble into a drawing game).
We got to use the self-service luggage consoles for
the first time. They're cool. You put your bag on the shelf
"as shown," scan your boarding pass, confirm it's yours, attach your
luggage tag, and after you've agreed it's good, a gate comes down, and
the shelf tips backwards onto a conveyor belt into the depths of the
airport. The kids loved it.
Then we went to lunch. Everyone got what they
wanted (nuggets, fries, half a slice of pepperoni pizza, and a
chocolate muffin for the boys, plus a banana for B, and ribs, fries,
and a chocolate muffin for me. Yummy filling lunch we ate not in
a hurry. I Spy at the gate, and sudoku on the plane, while I
dozed a bit, unable to keep my eyes open.
Collected our bags, and met up with C's French
co-worker, who has been so helpful. We collected our rental car
and he drove us to the hospital. TomTom said it would take 36
minutes, but that was without the horrid traffic we encountered.
C ended up calling to make sure we were okay and en route. I
think we arrived at the hospital after 7, and our flight got in at 5.
The hospital was not quite what I expected. We
just went right in, up the elevator, and into the room (me first, then
kids too, briefly) without seeing anyone official, nor anyone we saw at
all interested in what we were doing. I don't know if it was the
missing security or the missing paranoia that made it so odd.
Visiting hours are apparently from 11 am to 8 pm. I got to see C,
and watched him turn onto his side, but I didn't really get any new
information. I'm brimming with questions, but they will have to
wait. The hospital didn't have a cafeteria (see? odd.), so
after emergency yogurt, we navigated to the hotel where the co-worker
left us.
Kids explored our balcony while I took out my nearly
too filmy to see through contacts, and then we went in search of
dinner. Entrecote for me and dorado for the kids (because the
saumon was finished), plus a very sour salade des fruits I couldn't
finish and vanille glace for the kids so they got their calcium.
Dinner ended after 10, and we were back in the hotel with all sleeping
arrangements ironed out (there's a trundle bed to divide up), and
brushed, flossed and rinsed, and they were in bed by 11. Now it's
midnight and I keep zoning out in the middle here. Haven't dealt
with internet access yet, so I'm going to save and sleep.
June 28, 2010
This is probably (almost certainly) not what I
should be doing right now, sitting here writing, but I'm trying to
carve out some space for me to breathe in the middle of this
chaos. I have to figure out which things to do I need to ask for
help with, which things I need to do, and which things I need to let go
of. None of it is easy, deciding, asking for help, doing, nor
letting go. And this is where the tears come, because this is not
how I wanted these two weeks to go.
For those of you readers not on Facebook, here's the
scoop. C had a freaky fall into the bottom of a boat yesterday in
the south of France with some work folks when they hit a wake while he
was changing positions -- and he broke his back. 12th thoracic
vertebra compression fracture. He was moved to Marseille, and is
being taken care of by the best doctors for his problem in southern
France. He will have surgery on Wednesday morning to fuse the
vertebrae and have a plate installed to protect the nerve. He is
expected to recover quickly and fully, and will be able to travel back
home (though not by plane) five days later (about Monday). He
will be unable to travel to the states for his cousin's wedding, though
the boys and I will go in his stead, and stay in Seattle for that week
before coming back home to pack up. In the meantime, the three of
us will fly out Wednesday afternoon and be with him through his
"re-education" or rehabilitation, and then travel back here in time for
graduation ceremonies and the end of school.
Need to Do: Work out the details for dog and
cat care. Pack our bags; remember the TomTom. Need to find
out if I need to bring clothes for C as well. Hand over keys to
all who need them. Put together a memory page for J's leaving
album - I will see how late I can leave this; maybe I can work on it
from the waiting room in France. B needs to finish his 4 leaving
pages for classmates. He has been working on them, but needs some
help picking and printing photgraphs. Sleep. Laundry.
Dishes. Meals. Eat. B's orthodontist appointment
early Wednesday morning. Lunch planned tomorrow. Brunch
Wednesday. Work.
Ask for Help With: Watching the dog and cat
during our absence - I think there is a plan in place (thanks K!),
though I still need to work out the details. Getting a shirt for
A signed by his classmates. Getting some sheets of A4 paper for
the leaving pages. Getting a couple white button-down shirts for
the boys to wear under their vests and ties for the wedding; we can
likely manage to scrounge dark pants that work, but shirts are harder
to fake. I was going to do this this coming weekend, but that's
not on. Making sure the thank you gift for B's teacher is signed
by everyone in his class. Concentrating on others instead of
myself.
Letting Go: I knew this was the toughest
one. Portfolio sharing with B. Circus Day. A's class
outing to the park. B's class picnic. Leisurely afternoons
at King's Ijscafe. Photos with friends before we all part ways
this summer. Baking for the staffroom and giving away our food
the way I wanted to. Playdates for the kids with their favorite
folks. A clean and tidy house.
Okay, I need to go to bed and deal with some of this
tomorrow. I can't do any more tonight.
June 28, 2010
Charles' surgery is set for Wednesday. The boys and
I fly down there that afternoon to be with him during recovery, which
is planned for 5 days. Doc will fuse the vertebrae and install a plate
to protect the nerve. Says apart from a slight loss of movement, there
should be no real long-term aftereffects.
June 27, 2010
C broke a vertebra in the south of France and will
have surgery there in a day or so. He's mostly ok, but far away. All
our plans are now up in the air. Wish he was here and unhurt.
June 24, 2010
As often happens, my need for writing is inversely
proportional to the time I have for it. It is a morning that I
would normally be at work. I am waiting for the movers to come
and do their survey of our stuff. The property management company
that is selling this house for the expat owners were here this morning
to take pictures for the sale. Even earlier this morning, the
plumbers finally came. The drainage problem surfaced late Monday
night, after a Sunday trap cleaning and four loads of laundry.
Tuesday morning we called the landlord and explained that we had
standing water in the shower and the bathtub that would not drain, so
could not use the related sink or washing machine. Tuesday
afternoon, after a lot of silence, I checked with the landlords, who
had, yes, that morning talked to the plumber who was supposed to call
me, and confirmed they had my mobile number correct. Wednesday
morning the plumber called and made an appointment for 10:30. I
took off from work and waited, and finally called the plumber at 11:15
to find out what was up. They tried to tell me I should wait
until 2:00, which I explained was impossible. He tried to tell me
that it wasn't possible or reasonable to predict how long his engineer
would be at a job, and that it wasn't his fault they made an
appointment and didn't show up. I ranted back that I recognized
that he couldn't predict how long a problem would take to resolve, but
that does not excuse refusing to recognize the obligation to call when
you can't make an appointment you have set up. After that, he
made an appointment for us at 7:30 this morning; it felt punitive, even
if it just meant that we were first in line. So this morning, the
plumber took a 15 second look and pronounced that a different kind of
company
(essentially rotorooters) were needed to take care of the problem, and
that
that company would call me to set up an appointment. Haven't
heard yet. I am not optimistic. I am tired of being
considered a stupid renter who doesn't know what is needed, or at least
of not being listened to when I explain what the problem is. This
happened with the upstairs light that needed replacing, the lightswitch
that failed, the leaking roof, the outside light/circuit breaker and
the broken window, that the person who came out initially wasn't the
right person or company complete the job. Despite our being quite
clear and specific about what the problem was, we still had to have
some Dutch eyes on it before we got the service we had requested in the
first place. Argh! Looking forward to being the owners
again.
Wow. Somehow, having a set of empty boxes in
our front entryway emphasizes the point that we're moving more than
even last night's farewell. I'm very glad we decided to go home
for the wedding and then return here to do the packing up. I
can't imagine how much crazier my life would be right now if I was also
trying to get our life boxed up, or living out of a hotel. There
were no big surprises from the moving company discussion and
survey. I still don't know our air freight allowance, nor have we
figured out what items should go in that. I remember on the way
over we brought Legos, Puffy (a pillow), some kitchen things, and our
double jogger. I remember wishing I'd brought more clothes, a
printer, my corn critters, and a pair of slippers. It will be
easier going back, not only because it is summer and shorts take up
less suitcase space than sweaters, but also because we're headed to a
place where we know people, shops, the language and how things are done.
Next plumbing appointment is set for tomorrow,
sometime between 12 and 3. This is not a productive work week for
me! I still have a couple days worth of brain dump to do, explaining on
paper what I do and how. In addition to getting the library ready
for the summer with all the books returned from students and classmates
and on the shelves. Plus there are three stacks of staff room
teacher books to catalogue... Good thing there are two more weeks
of school left.
As expected, our dates have firmed up. Here's
the plan: Wrap up activities and school by the last day of school
(July 9). Fly (July 9) to Vancouver for the wedding (July
10). Travel to Seattle by car (July 12/13). C works a
couple days, we play with Seattle friends, and then we fly back here
(July 17). We pack up the house (that is, we organize what gets
packed by movers, and we get rid of the things we aren't taking with
us, July 18-25). Movers come and pack up our things while we stay
in a hotel (July 26-28). C works his last day in the Netherlands,
and our rental undergoes its final inspection (July 30). Then we
vacation for two weeks, probably traveling to Normandy, across the
Channel, and up into Scotland, then back down. We fly out for the
last time (August 14) back to Seattle. C starts working again
(August 16). Our air freight and the things in storage get
delivered and my niece stays with us in a house full of rental
furniture until her apartment is available in September. Various
friends and family visit Seattle and we get to see them. The kids
are signed up for soccer camp end of August. We start school
again in September (8). Our belongings are returned to us around
late September.
There are still a number of question marks.
The biggest one is when and how the pets travel.
That's all looking forward. What happened this
last month? B almost got his braces off, but not quite.
It's not clear if he will get them off before we leave or not.
(Which reminds me I can start setting up appointments for doctors,
dentists, orthodontists, and eye doctors.) B's class went to camp
(a youth hostel) for three days. He didn't have a great time, and
A missed his brother a lot too. His homework assignment this week
was writing about his favorite memories of camp, and it was very
difficult for him to get started. The boys went to Scout camp
last weekend together (interrupted by us taking them for their "B" and
"C" diploma swims) and had a better time. Their swimming and
Dutch tutoring has wrapped up recently, and voetbal what seems like ages
ago. Next week is the last meeting of Scouts. Drama was
supposed to get together one last time for a movie excursion, but I
haven't heard that a time has been worked out. We've been
watching the World Cup and are relived that the US is going forward to
the next round.
The International Fair was quite enjoyable, though I
did almost nothing besides sell books. The book stall did well,
selling over 734 books at 2/euro, and I was glad to get the 46 boxes of
books out of my house. I also cooked a bunch and got in sight of
the bottom of my freezer. I've been cooking and baking with the
aim of using up all of our food, since we can't have the movers pack a
speck of it. The brownies are never in sufficient quantity to
bring to school to share, but that hasn't been true for pumpkin bread
or grape juice.
There have been a number of farewell parties for
friends. I've been trying to ask questions of those who have been
repats, either here, or starting back to the States. I'm trying
to be prepared for moving to the foreign country that is supposed to be
my home country. Only time, of course, will tell how well-, or
ill-, prepared I am. I have also been answering the same
questions again and again, so I'll do so here too: How do I feel about the move?
I'm sad to leave my friends and the life I've made here, but I'm
excited to go back too. It has been hard to be so far away from
friends and family, and I am looking forward to many things, from cat
flaps to gallons of milk, from customer service to Netflix. It has
helped that we always planned to be here for the length of the expat
contract and we are on schedule, so our expectations were on target,
and there weren't any surprises to the timing. How long have you been here?
It will be almost three years. Did
you
like
living
here? The first six months were very hard,
but we got through it, and made some changes, got more involved, and
really made this our home. We will miss the Netherlands, the
international school, the opportunities and the benefits of living in
another culture. I'm very glad that we did this; it was very good
for all of us. What do the kids
think? They also have mixed feelings. They are
looking forward to going back to Seattle, but they will miss their
friends here, very much. I think that A will have a more
difficult time than his brother, partly because he only had four months
at the school before we moved, and partly because he tends to make one
or two strong friendships, and it will be hard for him to lose his best
friend here (again). I hope that he is learning that he can find
and make a new best friend, but it will take time. What are your plans? We go on
vacation after school, return to pack up, take our last European
vacation, then go back to our same house and the kids will be in the
same school that we left in mid-August. What will you do with your time when you're
back home? Any sort of 9-5 job away from home has no real
appeal to me. I'd like to do more with my photography. I'd
like to do more writing. I'd like to do the projects that I
brought here with me that I never got to. I'd like to spend some
time exploring my long-time wish to run a bakery/bookstore. I'm
not sure how involved I will get with the kids' school, though I'd like
it to be less than I was involved with the school here this past
year. We shall see. I don't have a good answer for this
yet, but I'm certain I won't be bored!
The weather has been just lovely. We're
enjoying heat, and of course the summer solstice this far north brings
extra long days as well. I hope to spend a number of afternoons
hanging out at the Ijscafe down the street after school, so I hope our
summer lasts longer than just a week.
Tomorrow is another busy day. Farewell party
for me, plumber, A's portfolio sharing, C leaves for France, and I'd
really like to get more than five hours of sleep for at least one night
this week. C isn't home yet from a work function, but I can't
stay up any longer. G'night.
June 23, 2010
Not the morning I thought. Braces didn't come off B
as anticipated, and the plumber didn't show or call (now set for 7:30
am tomorrow - ugh). Back to work now and hope my staff appreciation
lunch and evening farewell parties go better.
June 16, 2010
Forward progress today (hooray!) brought to you by
the deleted solitaire game on my Touch. Ha. Somehow I don't think it
has the power to sponsor the next two months all by itself, though.
Spent today gathering some of the scattered parts of my brain - hope I
find all the pieces by the time we move out of here!
June 13, 2010
I am remembering why I stopped wearing my hair this
way. Wish I'd done so before I used the scissors. May need professional
help, not unlike a toddler caught after the fact.
June 12, 2010
Successful fair! Manned the book stall and moved 46
boxes of books, most of which sold, none of which re-entered the house.
Sold all the jams and jellies and used up a bunch of zucchini, pumpkin,
white chocolate chips and corn flakes (not all in the same dessert!).
Since I can't take any food with me when I move, I'...m glad the school
got the proceeds. Still more using up to be done, though! But I
can now see the bottom of my chest freezer!
May 31, 2010
Gentleman from our landlord's service came by for a
"home inspection" today. Turns out the owner is trying to decide
whether or not to sell and needed some makelaar eyes on it to figure
out price and such. Nothing to defend or promise to fix. At least the
whole house got tidied!
May 27, 2010
We were surprised last night with very sweet leaving
gifts from the boys' coach and voetbal team. Signed team photo shirts
and team window dangles and keychains. A says he'll wear it every warm
practice in future for luck. I'm not sure I'm ready for goodbyes yet.
May 21, 2010
Swear words, repeatedly. I hate this
feeling. I'm short on sleep due to my own folly. I
abandoned work because I was too widgy and there were classes there so
I didn't have full access to uninterrupted computer time. I have
bopped around this house half-doing half a dozen things, and noting
hundreds more. There are so many things I haven't done.
Some I need to do. Some I won't be able to do. Some I don't
want to do. I'm hormonal and overwhelmed and trying desperately
to just do something productive. I'm hungry but nothing
satisfies, even in my imagination. I hate hate hate this.
And it's only 10:30. I need to pick up the kids from
school. I need to get us to the soccer tournament tomorrow at
quarter to 8. I need to remember the camera when we visit friends
on Sunday. That's it. Everything else can hang if necessary.
May 19, 2010
C and I did a lot of talking last night and are
ready to put our first tentative date forward for our return.
Probably we will be returning to Seattle the first part of
August. That is still dependent on a lot of work things, but a
couple of things are clearer. I don't want to try to pack up at
the same time that I am wrapping up my work and school responsibilities
and saying goodbyes before school gets out, so that will have to happen
in mid-July after the wedding. Probably we will be living without
our stuff (bar luggage and an air freight box) for six to eight weeks
after it gets shipped, so school will start before we get it. The
more traveling and visiting we do during those weeks the less we will
miss our own stuff. Yet, traveling without C in Europe is less
likely than traveling in the States without him. And as C's work
situation becomes clearer, we can refine things a lot more. Right
now it looks like he might be here past my leaving date if he didn't
have any part to play in the timing (which he does, to some
extent). Still, vacation time, his work goals before the job
change, and the Dutch proclivity for being largely gone from work
during those six weeks of July and August, all have something to
contribute to the conversation too.
Thoughtful times, these. Want to build the
life I want us to have there. Talked to a Dutch repat this
morning and got some advice. I'll be following closely how it
goes for some of my friends as they repatriate this summer too. I
may go looking for some folks in Seattle who've had expat lives too,
just for some local understanding. And while I'm looking forward
to having close friends and family nearby again, I'm trying to keep my
expectations vague. I hope to get some of this internal thinking
onto paper/ether sometime soon, but right now it's not particularly
coherent.
May 13, 2010
A bit more about the cruise, since I was thinking
about it this morning. One unexpected thing was all the alcohol
hand-gel stations on and around the ship. They were stationed at
all the eating entrances, of course, with a greeter/monitor, and just
before you had to pull out your card to re-board the boat (always a bit
of wet fumbling there), and multiple other locations around the
ship. In addition, before boarding we filled out a form saying
whether we had experienced any symptoms of any kind in the past several
days. It noted that saying yes didn't necessarily mean you
couldn't board, but that the ship's physician would evaluate you
beforehand. Whatever they were doing, it seemed to work.
The odd cough or sneeze really seemed to turn heads because it was so
unusual.
The ship sells excursions, of course, in which you
sign up for a tour and then go as a group on a bus with a guide.
The only one of these we signed up for was Ephesus. It was
wonderful - our guide was very knowledgeable and interesting and we
learned a lot about the old city and its wonders. We learned why
it was abandoned and essentially lost until less than 150 years ago; a
very important port city where the silk route and the spice route came
through, second largest city in the world, visited and inhabited by
many important people, had the misfortune to be a port city further and
further from the water (depite dredging efforts; it is now 5k from the
sea). The capitol moved to Constantinople and people abandoned
the city completely over time. The grasses and vegetation covered
everything and when folks look for a port city, they expect it to be
near the water. The city was founded in the 10th century BCE and
was a very cosmopolitan and modern city for its time. It is
divided into uptown, midtown, and downtown. The villas on the
hills had running water and an advanced system of aqueducts; the city
streets had sewers in them; the main streets were lit with torches at
night. The great Celsus library was across the street from a
brothel, and a secret passageway linked them. The traders were
required to bathe in the traders bath before entering the city.
One of the group asked where Saint Paul preached, and the answer was
every street corner; Christianity was not strong enough or old enough
to have churches at that time, but he was certainly a resident and we
still have the book of Ephesians. I enjoyed the tour very much
and wasn't offended even by the very interesting and low-pressure sales
tactics of the hand-made carpet store where we ended our tour. In
fact, the carpet-making demonstration we watched was the boys' favorite
part of the day. We explored Dubrovnik, Santorini, Corfu and
Venice on our own, though we bought the shuttle tickets for a couple
places where the taxis and other forms of transportation were cheaper
and faster. Oh well.
We had been warned about the pain of having to pick
up kids for lunch when their programs close for a couple of hours in
the middle of the day. However, the hours of the kid program
(Adventure Ocean) were very accommodating to folks, especially during
days in port, and would accept them before and during mealtimes.
There was never a time when we couldn't do something off the ship
because we had to get the kids. The first city we visited was
Dubrovnik and by then A didn't want to leave the ship, so C, B and I
walked the walls of the city and enjoyed gelato on the water. We
returned at least an hour before we had to, but according to staff, A
had been crying for most of the time, worried that we would not make it
back in time, and not knowing when anything was happening. So, we
insisted that he not be left alone again. The next time we gave
him a choice (Santorini), he again wanted to stay aboard, and this time
B consented to stay with him. He definitely enjoys doing more
than looking, and I am hoping that his incredible inertial qualities
abate somewhat soon. It was nevertheless very nice to travel
without the kids through the town of Thira/Fira, and eat and wander and
take pictures with just my C. I do wish that I had remembered to
bring their fancy clothes for the two formal nights.
The boat publishes "suggested guidelines" for
tipping the head waiter, waiter, assistant waiter and stateroom
attendant per person per day, all of which you can conveniently prepay
on your credit card. While the amounts initially astounded me, I
have to say that the service we got was extremely good. The
waiters were very accommodating, and since A and B had almost
invariably the same thing every evening (fruit starter, fries and
chicken nuggets, ketchup, milk for A - and it was indeed good), it was
quick to the table and we were able to drop them off for things like
Pirate Night and return to the table for a more leisurely dinner with
each other. The chef even cooked two different somethings
off-menu at the end of the week for C when he heard that C wanted
something truly spicy. The stateroom attendant was kindly and
neat, and supplied us with fabulous towel animals every evening.
Probably since we booked from an IP in Holland, we
were seated at dinner near a bunch of Dutch folks. Interestingly,
we also encountered two other American families with kids the same ages
living in different parts of the Netherlands, both of them planning on
going home to the States this summer the same as us. The staff
was from all over, but there were quite a few from Brazil, where I
understand the ship came from. Apparently they were two weeks
into a six month stint of solid work, and then they take 1-2 months off.
I participated in a jewelry making workshop on
board, and enjoyed them very much. I ended up making three sets
of earrings with matching necklaces, a bracelet and an anklet.
Mostly I was reminded that this is somthing I would like to do more of
for myself, and that neither the techniques nor the labor was very
difficult. I bought a necklace in Dubrovnik I liked because I
could copy the beadwork with the model at hand. And while walking
through the glasswork showrooms in Murano, I realized how I am much
more at peace paying someone to do something I can't do, that something
I can. Working with glass is something I am never going to
do. Painting, pottery, jewelry, and housework all fall into the
other category. I took a number of pictures of things to serve as
ideas for me later. Carpet-making, of course, also falls into the
never-going-to-do category, but while I very much admire the work and
workmanship involved, hand-made rugs have never been very appealing to
me. I am hard on my floor-coverings, and would hate to be
careful, and it doesn't make sense to me to buy a rug and put it up on
my wall. I'd rather do more with my photos, get more cool maps,
and frame my posters. C was apparently worried about me and
whether he knew me anymore when I asked about the price of some of the
vases I saw in the showroom. I just wanted to know what range
they were being so mysterious about; paying over a $1000 for a
breakable vase, even one I could never make myself, is not me. He
asked me later about having "nice things" and apparently that would
entail having designed rooms where everything went together instead of
those "nice things" being a part of the mishmash of things we've
collected and put together in our house to date. I don't agree
with him, though. Apparently our "nice" couches don't count the
same way in his mind, I'm guessing because they are mainly functional
rather than mainly decorational. I do want a house full of a
mishmash of nice things (nice meaning of value aesthetically or
emotionally rather than monetarily), and worked on collecting some of
that this trip, both in photos and "stuff."
One of the things we have started collecting is
flags, and we made sure to get one from each of the countries we
visited. We have a number to locate and acquire that we missed
getting earlier.
While the kids program aboard ship was wonderful,
and the kids loved it, it wasn't perfect. The young adults in
charge had the energy for kids, but they didn't seem to be trained in
parenting techniques and they weren't parents themselves. There
was also a machismo ethic present in which several of the kids,
including a four-year-old, were told repeatedly that "boys don't
cry." There was also a lot of concern about the kids crying when
we returned to pick them up. I understood that they were storing
up their emotions until they had us around (A especially) because they
didn't feel emotionally safe, and that our picking them up let them
express themselves to someone who wasn't going to berate them or try to
joke them out of how they felt. There was also a lot of calling
the kids "peanut heads." When the climbing wall staff suggested
calling the counselors "shrimp brains" in response, A tried it.
He found that it escalated the issue instead of making it stop.
However, both A and B wanted to be in the Adventure Ocean program
almost all the time, and very much enjoyed pirate night, Star Wars
night, gaga ball, crazy tag, and quidditch.
May 10, 2010
Just back from a lovely cruise week without Internet
and am very slowly catching up. Pausing for breakfast now, and pet
pick-up and groceries will happen too, but plan to get through FB and
mail before checking if there's any possibility of recovering my photos
of Dubrovnik, Kusadasi, Ephesus and Santorini, because I'm not
optimistic.
May 2, 2010
It hardly seems real in my half awake state. I
have become accustomed to the rumble of the ship booking quickly to our
next destination (Croatia), but it is the wind whistling outside our
balcony that convinces me that I'm not at home in bed. The kids
aren't awake yet (it's only six am, so that's not as much a surprise as
I thought initially), and I am alone with my thoughts until I can get
the computer on and start typing.
We're on our first cruise. C joked as we were
standing in line in a warehouse either waiting to check in or waiting
to go through security, I don't remember, that this wasn't a side you
got to see of the Love Boat. Of course, that just wedged the tune
into my brain and made me see a bit of Captain Stubing in one of the
balding guests in white. We spent yesterday exploring the ship
once we got on it. Actually, there was a lot of traveling
yesterday - packing and putting the food away and washing dishes and
getting breakfast in us before heading out to the car at 7:15, a half
hour after we'd planned, both C and I apologizing to each other for the
delays, and I regretting the 2.5 hours of sleep I did get. But we
navigated the bridge that was out and made it to Schiphol, where the
great crowds of people at long-term parking and in the airport were not
calming to our pre-flight stress. Schiphol is a very efficient
and well-run airport, and we had already printed our boarding passes,
so we got to the gate with no trouble, filled our water bottles again,
and sat for only a few minutes before boarding. We tried to be
honest with the kids about the consequences of our missing the flight,
or the boat, without making them panic or taking on the qualities of
extreme worry that we (C especially) sometimes exhibit before getting
to the place where we're no longer responsible if we're late.
Anyway, flew to Venice, and got a taxi to the port, stood in line, and
then boarded the boat about 1 o'clock.
The kids have plastic armbands on for the duration
of the cruise with our muster station number printed on it, so that if
the kids are doing their own thing with the kids program onboard, they
can be escorted to meet us at muster station 12, where we go if there's
an emergency or drill. We found our room, a suite, with a bed,
fold-out sofa for the kids, balcony, and bathroom (I can't in all
conscience call it the "head" on a ship this big). As we got to
each new part of the ship, the boys wanted to start playing and doing,
but we insisted that we explore first so they knew what the options
were. So shuffleboard, ping pong, swimming (one of the pools A
calls "your swimming pool," just for parents), the rock-climbing wall,
miniature golf, the library and board games were all passed by the
first time. The kids and C played a round of golf while I took
pictures of our departure from Venice, and ping pong as I got our
things put away a bit in our room. Dinner took yummy precedence
over the kids climbing the rock wall, and then their favorite part of
the day commenced after dinner when they played on deck 10 in what they
called the "wind tunnel." Okay, I played too. It was pretty
fun to lean way into the wind, or jump straight up and be pushed
backwards by it.
Back in our suite after brushing teeth, I started to
read Room One. But only because we don't have more Paddington to
read, a book that the kids loved. And the wind and noise kept us
awake a few minutes longer than normal, but not much more than
that. Today we do breakfast and walk the walls of Dubrovnik.
C's co-workers were all sneering a bit at the idea
of cruising, thinking that it was for the elderly. But we're
actually a little too old (or at least parental) to do the late night
dancing scene that's available. He thinks it's just a matter of
the Dutch being cheap. My friends and co-workers were not so
disparaging, but then again they might have been just being
polite. I think that it will be a good way for our home-body
family to get out and see some cities that we wouldn't otherwise.
We get to keep our stuff in one place and venture out to new
environments each day, and the kids are tempted out of our room by all
sorts of activities - tonight is Star Wars night including light saber
battles and a lunar landing creative creation (can your egg survive?).
Much as I like camping (and I do wish we'd remembered to pack our
walkie talkies), and a Dutchie motor home might have gotten us to
Croatia and Turkey, it wouldn't have made it to the Greek islands, and
we wouldn't have been able to make any sort of distance while we
slept! We're only just starting day 2, however, so I'll save the
evaluation for later on.
April 26, 2010
Great weekend. Saturday we had a soccer match
in the morning and the kids celebrated their champion status with
signs, pictures, fries, and team painting on the windows at the
club. Directly afterwards the kids had quick showers, garbed in
black and we dropped them off for a last practice of the play before
the performance two hours later. C and I got groceries and
flowers, talked, and walked all four bikes over so we could ride home
in the glorious weather. The performance was a bit rocky, but
definitely enjoyed by all in the audience. (B was actually in
tears about it after being tucked in, but I think it was the late hour
that let the perfectionist tendencies get the upper hand for a
bit. And A didn't want anything to do with the flowers I brought
because he didn't feel like he deserved them.) They could have
used more practice time, but the play couldn't have happened at all
without the main character, whose family is sadly moving back to the
States shortly. Once home, I dug up the entirety of our
yard. Our grassy space measures (I just checked) 280 cm x 210 cm,
and this is a land very short on stones, so it wasn't particularly
tough digging. Nevertheless, the grass was patchy and there was a
definite hollow in the middle we felt we needed to fix before returning
the property to the owners. So dig I did, then raked it somewhat
smooth, added packaged soil, sprinkled grass seed and then watered
it. Yes, we finally got the sleutel
(key) we needed to turn on the water outside from the local hardware
store, dug a hose out of the shed and can now have water in our back
yard! Of course, the end of the hose is simply cut, so I am
sprinkling by putting my thumb over the end to create a spray, but it
isn't (as I said before) a very large space, so it doesn't take that
much time. Then in the process of sweeping the scattered dirt
back into the paving-stone encased proto-yard, decided I needed to get
the moss, weeds, and shmutz from between each paving stone. So
interrupted by dinner and armed with my weeding weapon, (I love that
thing; thanks again Rebecca! Of course, I just tried to find a
link to a picture of it, but failed, and all the identifying stickers
on it have worn away. The only words carved in the steel of the
blade part are "wear safety goggles." Additionally, the blade is
now worn where I...) I scraped between each stone where they joined and
then swept it all either into the yard waste or into the once sandbox
now potato bed. Arms tired, and jeans dirty, I fell asleep early.
Sunday we planned to go to Keukenhof. We were advised
to go early to avoid the crowd, like at 10:00 when it opened, and to
buy tickets online. Turned out they open at 8:00, and getting the
kids to buy into this and for us to decide this was something we were
willing to push to do as a family (instead of me going off by myself
while kids were at school) took until after noon. We left at 2 pm
and arrived at 3 after many Fox Trot
comics were read aloud from the back seat. Buying tickets online
was a good idea, though, even though there was no line by the time we
got there. Fortunately, A's "I don't WANT to go!" was transformed
into "I'm glad we came" after a brownie and a bunch of tulip photos
into the visit. Buying each of them a digital camera of their own
was one of the smarter things we've done. And we hadn't by then
even hit the playground or the "splash bridge." Very
fortuitously, we had replacement batteries for B's camera in the case,
B's sunglasses were discovered missing and actually still on the ground
in the stick tunnel where they had fallen off his shirt going through
nearly 20 minutes earlier, the running around banging into each other
and falling on the pavement accident happened on our way out of the
park, I had just enough Band-Aids/plasters, and we remembered to place
our order for Thai food from the car in time for the wait to be short
once we arrived home. Nice day. And once the kids were in
bed I cycled to the video store to pick up the remaining discs of Burn Notice season one
since there was nothing on our DVR but Mythbusters. Now
if only I had remembered to iron while watching, I would have had time
for my own breakfast BEFORE cycling with the kids to school.
Now it is noon and what I had intended to be a
productive day of putting pictures up (I even envisaged updating the
homepage family picture to something recent!) has turned into an
enjoyable morning sitting in the sun reading all of my friend Amy's
expat blog, and a blog posting of my own with breaks to measure our
yard and look for manufacturer's names on my weeding weapon.
Pictures to be tackled after lunch!!
April 21, 2010
How the heck did I get quite so committed? I
am feeling overstretched and a bit panicked that I'm in the process of
dropping a ball or two right now as I sit here typing. I'm at
soccer again, typing while the boys practice. They have two more
games left before they are done laying waste to their opponents.
They are undefeated and have a lock on first place. It's fun to
watch them play; A was scored on first in their last game, and B then
scored to tie up the score before the team went on to a 4-1 victory.
It will be interesting to see how they compare to their
non-European peers next year.
Today was the second day of the book fair at
school. I still need to finish my library order for the two
companies, as well as catalogue the books I have already. The
boys both (of course) found books they wanted as well. A has a
project due tomorrow on his unit (a disaster that happened in his home
country - he chose Mt. St. Helens), and I spent a couple hours making
sure he was able to complete what he needed to. I checked out the
time of the boys' play on Saturday, and sent regrets for a birthday
party B will have to miss because of it. I still need to print
out the scripts, the Avondvierdaagse forms, and the Mt. St. Helens
pictures tonight. I have a final payment to make for our May
vacation plans (cruising in the Mediterranean), some forms to complete,
and a place to secure for the pets while we're gone. I have
dinner to make when we get home, and B needs to finish his homework as
well. Though his isn't due until Friday, Thursday is so full of
school/work, drama, and Scouts, that there isn't more than a few
minutes before bedtime. I need also to mobilize for the used book
sale I'm in charge of for the International Fair, and organize the May
and June parent volunteers for classroom reading. Of course
there's a lot of e-mail of a more personal nature that I can't deal
with right now as well. Course I'm not particularly pleased that
my friendships and relationships are often the balls getting dropped.
We finished the Swiss Family Robinson last
night. I'm not sure what's next on our night time reading list.
I should be running while the kids are at practice,
but that's also a ball that gets dropped fairly often. Just as
I'm better at getting the kids fed and snacks and lunches made for the
day than I am at getting myself a good breakfast and timely lunch, I am
better at getting the kids to their activities on time than I am at
making time for my running. The Nike race was pretty good at
making me get out at least a few times before the run, but I don't
enjoy races enough on their own to enter a bunch just so I am spurred
into training for them. On the other hand, I really like how I
feel when I'm in shape, and after I run a good distance. One of
these days I'll get better at knowing how much time I need to do what I
want/need/commit to do, and say no more often, to others as well as
myself.
We still don't have a lot of information on when we
will be moving back. Broad outlines are there (as they have been
since the beginning): we'll finish the school year here (July 9th),
we'll fly to BC for a wedding (July 10), our renters are out at the end
of July, we'll start school in Seattle (early September). But the
space in between those points could be on either continent. The
paperwork for returning has been started, but C still doesn't have
details or particulars on his return-to job. Could be earlier or
later than our planned move. I'm sure it will all happen and
probably things will happen all at once. I'm not worried about
it. But, although I am already sad and it will be hard to leave,
I am so ready to be home already! I know it's not helping our
repatriation transition to have too many expectations for how things
will be, but it's so hard not to. So many things I am looking
forward to that I KNOW will be true (features of our house, stores
open, relatives nearby, products and foods I like), it is hard to keep
from expecting the things that I only THINK will be, especially when
I've probably got some things in the wrong columns. Additionally,
I am aware that I sometimes mistake my feelings of needing to change my
circumstances for the need to change my location, thinking that if only
this were different it would all be okay, even as I know the truth is
not so simple.
April 18, 2010
My iPod once again recorded just the pre-race
distance - apparently I burned only 7 calories doing the Nike Hilversum
10k in just under an hour. I would have liked more pace details. I'll
have to see what info I can get from the race sensor in my other shoe.
April 16, 2010
I am feeling very out of touch with life on the
other side of the pond. Just found out my old dormmate and friend was in the midst of confirmation
hearings for the 9th Circuit today. Go G'Liu!
April 5, 2010
My eye has been twitching for over a week and the
common consensus seems to be that it is stress related. I don't
necessarily disagree, but it seems odd that it doesn't correspond at
all to the amount of sleep I get during a night. It is in fact
worse today (during the fifth day of a six day school break) than it
was when it started. There are a few big things on my list.
Some I have been tackling, and some C is helping me with. He's
making dinner right now so I can blog.
Today I ran 10k. I've been gearing up for the
Nike 10k here on the 18th. I haven't really been working hard on
getting in shape. Back in February I wanted to start, and had a
glorious 5 mile run just as I was coming down with chicken pox, and
after not having run any distance for months. Then, partly
because I've been sick with something almost continuously since then
(right now it's a head cold that's on the mend), the next run I did was
last Wednesday. While the kids were at voetbal practice, I ran for 10
minute miles for 45 minutes. I feel both thankful that I can run
so long and well with so little "training," and a little abashed.
Running has always been my sport. I enjoy running, running in the
rain has been one of the most therapeutic things I can do, and yet it
still feels weird to have it come so much more easily than for some
(only some!) of my friends. Unfortunately, I think because I can
run long distances without working up to it, I let other commitments
and time demands push running out of my daily life. The Nike run
is helping to clarify when during the week I can run on a regular
basis. And the dog is an issue too, since he needs and wants
exercise, but not quite as much or as fast as I need to go for
myself. I am therefore trying to build in dog-walking times to
the week as well, on non-running days, such as while the kids are at
Scouts.
April 4, 2010
Used my beautiful new strawberry bowl for the first
time at breakfast this morning. Thanks mom! Happy Easter everyone!
April 2, 2010
My eldest's foot is not broken, according to x-rays,
and he should "rest, and he can have a pain reliever," according to the
doc. Fortunately, no soccer game tomorrow, and nothing scheduled until
Tuesday, so he's hopping only for a while after a bad landing at
KidzCity.
March 30, 2010
I have had a left eyelid twitch or spasm
periodically for the last
four days. It appears to be unrelated to how much or little sleep I've
gotten, or how much water I've drunk. Any other ideas on how to get rid
of it?
March 10, 2010
Holey moley heck and a half. It has been an
incredible month of sickness in my life. I left for Michigan on
the 18th and had the first sores in my mouth and on my scalp that I
recognized as chicken pox three days later. By then it was very
clear I was sick with spots, fever, tiredness and muscle aches. I
couldn't tell, however, whether the muscle aches were from my awesome
five mile run or from being sick. [Oh, the run was
glorious! Flat flat Michigan snowy roads in the sun, where the
black and yellow arrows at the end of the road look not so far away,
while the house looked much smaller the second time I turned around to
run back. Even the stretch afterwards was invigorating and felt
great. Ah, it had (and now has again) been too long. At the
same time, it was reassuring. Unless I'm injured, the 10k in
April is totally doable.]
I am so glad that I was in Michigan instead of
Florida (cold snowy weather was much better than weather where I'd have
wanted to be outside with other people; apparently it's better for the
itching not to sweat, too). And I'm so glad that I was with
family and folks that loved me and took care of me. I am so
hopeful that none of that family gets a case of chicken pox or shingles
because of me. I know it's not my fault I got sick. Since I
had a mild case as a kid, there was no way for me to know I'd contract
chicken pox again. Still, it was a disgusting disease. The
pleurisy didn't help either.
I wore a turtleneck, borrowed a hat, and used lots
of makeup to get through security and back to Schiphol Airport.
By then, most all of my pox had crusted over. I'm not certain I
wasn't still a little contagious, but I kept to myself and wanted more
than anything to get home. In
the
comment
section is the Facebook
commentary during this whole debacle.
Then, despite hand-washing, A's stomach
bug-both-ends-illness-over-the-weekend, hit B and I last night. I
have to
say, using a bucket I found much more pleasant than the whole porcelain
goddess thing. Fortunately, it seems to be a pretty short-lived
virus, and although B missed school today, he went to his orthodontist
appointment, and is playing soccer in the cold at the moment.
Yes, it's still cold, but I was very happy to come
home to snowdrops instead of snow.
February 15,
2010
If the dog lost weight during his sickness in
November, he's no longer still losing it. I suspect part of that is the
continued snow and my inactivity, though it's still reassuring. He
turns 14 this spring. Just calculated 22.1 kg into pounds and think he
could stand to lose some, so won't worry about towing him along as I
get ready for the Nike run.
February 10, 2010
It snowed again today. I'm really going to
have to stop saying that the weather here is similar to Seattle.
This winter has not been similar at all. Colder, snowier,
darker. I keep checking my iTouch weather app and noticing that
the temperatures for the week here are consistently 20 degrees colder
than those in Seattle. I'm done with it. Except I can't
quite be. Florida in February has morphed into Michigan
instead. So I don't really anticipate an end to winter anytime
soon.
It's hard to tease apart what is just wanting to be
back in Seattle in our life and home, and what is simply frustration
with where I am at the moment. I can't be entirely sure that my
longings to be home aren't just longings for change (of weather, for
instance). Doesn't really matter, I guess, since I'm not making
decisions about coming home based on how I'm feeling. Plan
remains the same: finish the school year and fly back for a wedding the
same day. Whether that's the last flight, and when our pets make
the trip, and when our stuff gets packed up, and when C starts work and
moves back, are all questions that don't yet have answers.
Nevertheless, we are starting to make plans.
Where will the television go? Do we need new couches? When
do we re-do the deck? How will we fit particular pieces of
furniture around our rooms? It's exciting. It also
increases our longing, I think, but I hope it will also get us a better
or smoother re-entry.
February 8, 2010
Gaaah! I need strategies for when I'm stuck
that are better than stay up very late, avoid
everything, and feel like crap. I'm getting unstuck now. Working
on
the "do just one single thing," and
working up to "just attack the thing that has me stuck." There's
an e-mail response I haven't written that was this month's trigger
(sorry Matt). Still, it's not any kind of excuse at all for a
wholly unproductive week and weekend.
We celebrated A's turning 7 1/2 yesterday at KidZCity. Earlier in the day,
he had characterized two of the girls in his class as "not nice."
I had corrected him to say that perhaps what they said wasn't nice, but
that didn't mean they weren't nice. By the end of the party, I
felt like I owed him an apology for my correction. I think, since
I like their moms so much, that I had graced the daughters with
characteristics that they haven't got (or grown into yet). Yikes
and away. I think, too, that they can be worse in a pack.
Three incidents I saw in particular. Once at the beginning when I
was taking one of the later-arriving girls to find some people to play
with I greeted them and waved and they rushed right on past around us
without acknowledging me or their classmate at all. Second was
after ice-cream when a different girl asked if she could play laser tag
with them. "No." I'm all for assertiveness in girls and the
ability to say no is an important skill, but she was cutting and nearly
mocking with it. Third was watching one of them making fun of
some of the other kids for trying out the "plasma cars," which go by
themselves if you turn the wheel back and forth, and calling them
babies. Oy. Their teasing of another classmate is why A
doesn't want me to pack him any sausage sticks for snack or
lunch.
It does seem a bit out of hand.
Which isn't to say that A didn't have a marvelous
time at his party, because he did. I decided to celebrate his
semi-birthday (he decided my calling it a demi-birthday wasn't right
because he spell-checked it when he was writing an e-mail and
demi-birthday was rejected) because late July is an awful time in this
community to celebrate a birthday if you want to do so with
friends. Everyone (or enough of everyone) is gone to their home
countries or traveling. So, we celebrated with family in July,
and with friends at the half year mark. I was going to bake a
birthday cake, either for him or B (whose only cake was one he took in
to school), but C would prefer that I NOT sabotage his diet if I don't
have to. Maybe I'll bake it for B's Haitian Relief Bake Sale on
Thursday since I have the yogurt...
All the major projects are completed at work, so now
I can concentrate on training and knowledge transfer during the
anticipated much reduced hours I spend in the library. Catch up
on book repair and do a little reorganization. Oh, and catalogue
all of the books in the staffroom. Still, I should be able to
spend more time at home.
Heard B in the other room singing a silly song, but
with rude lyrics. When he got to "the f-word," I objected.
"Sorry," he said. I called him in and asked him if he knew what
the "f-word" was. He said he did. I asked if he knew what
it meant. He said he knew it was really rude. I agreed but
asked again if he knew what it meant. He shook his head and so I
told him. "That's a swear word?" he asked. "So when they
say that to someone they mean...?" he continued. "That's really
funny." Apparently it strikes him as curious that they would use
that act as a rude word. I'm not entirely clear, myself, on why
it is considered quite so vulgar (though the word "bloody," so
offensive to the English, I grok even less). I don't believe the
Dutch really think it's all that offensive either. In fact, there
was a local pizza company that used the word in their television ad
during prime time about a year ago, before outcry from us buitenlanders and threats of
boycott shut it down.
I figure it's part of my job to make sure both of
the boys understand the words that they use (or hear). And part
of my job to teach them about sex. Certainly I want them to come
to me instead of having it be a great schoolyard mystery... or
something he looks up on the Internet. I am glad he was amused at
the exchange rather than alarmed or chastened. Of course, this is
my eldest son - my younger is in the midst of groaning and covering his
eyes at any fictional depiction of kissing, like the grandson in
The Princess Bride. So maybe A would understand it as a swear
word for an entirely different reason!
January 25, 2010
So. It's hard to think of an appropriate word
with which to start
this monster post I intend. I am very aware that I haven't posted
an entry to my blog since October. And here it is a whole new
year. So. I'll just begin any old where and try to work my
way up to the present. For convenience sake, I may date them as
to when what I'm relating was actually happening. However, the
only content that was actually written when dated were the entries I'm
copying from Facebook. Hence the monstrous proportions of this
project. And the reasons I haven't started before now are long
and varied. Most recently, I really really wanted to get our
Christmas cards out the door and that required a lot more work than I'd
anticipated. So. Let's see....
There's the initial reason I stopped updating my
blog. Namely, my computer blew up. Well, not
literally. I was working on the computer, it gave me an error
code which I didn't pay enough attention to, and it got really, r e a l
l y, rr ee aa ll ll yy slow. I patiently and consistently closed
out the programs I was
using so that I could restart the computer and (I thought) fix the
problem. And it wouldn't restart. Could not. I tried
many things, but
it was clear early that I needed something I didn't have. We
bought a cable so we could try a brain transplant, and at least get the
data off of my hard drive. But it was more messed up than just a
cable could fix. I ended up trying out and then purchasing some
data recovery software from online that successfully found and
recovered most of my files. The family financials, all my
documents, my mail, and my web pages were the things I was most
concerned about recovering. I did a fair amount online and had
bookmarked a lot of sites for lots of reasons, and my bookmark file is
the thing I didn't recover that I most miss. (All of this was
exacerbated by being also between PDAs. I had too many Palm OS
devices break in one fashion or another, and had flirted with switching
over to an iTouch like C, but hadn't anything in hand yet.) Of
course,
progressing from oh #$%^! to the awaiting a cable to the purchase of a
new laptop to the transferring of recovered files to re-downloading the
programs, such as this one, with which I blog, took a fairly long
while. During which my life didn't stop and wait for me. My
mom came to visit for 4 weeks, we had a week's vacation from school, I
helped organize and participated in a big Halloween party, I turned 40,
we had B's birthday, and then there was decorating for Christmas, the
advent calendar, Sinterklaas and Christmas to prepare for. But
I'll get back to some of that later. I'm getting ahead of myself.
My laptop went kablooie and I got a new one. I
feel pretty good about the fact that my digital photographs were not at
risk or a worry to me. I would have been feeling physically ill
to lose all of my digital photos with a downed computer. And I
knew this about myself, and so was very glad to have invested several
years
ago in an offsite storage site (fotki) for my pix. I am happy
with them; I can lock the albums if I like, I can ftp the data to them,
and I have unlimited space with which to play. The family
financials had been backed up to a different hard drive in the
not-too-excruciating-to-reenter past, though I will be backing that up
in two places more often as well. The mail, though. That
was the big AAAUGH! for me. I had over 13 years' worth of mail on
that drive. So, I went about making sure that it was off-site as
well. Found a way using IMAP to copy all those years' worth of
mail from Pegasus to a gmail account, and then moved it and my
automatic forward over. I still use Pegasus for finding the
latest message, address book, and working offline, but I suspect even
that may tail off in time. Too bad, because I really liked
Pegasus, but the risk of losing it all (again) and the attraction of
having it available to me from any computer were too much to
ignore. This was not, however, a quick or painless switch.
It was a long and painful switch. That's a lot of mail. I'm
still not done sorting through it.
October 18,
2009: My laptop died a quick and horrible death. I'm
waiting on a cable to attempt a brain transplant, and deciding how I
want this new machine to work for me. "Better" and "backed-up" spring
to mind.
October 26, 2009:
My
laptop
brain
transfer
has
been
mostly
successful
so
far,
thanks
to
recovery
software
and
a
cable.
Mail
is
back
up
and
documents
retrieved,
though
bookmarks
are
gone.
Now for Quicken...
My mom came for a four week visit. She had
just arrived at the time of my last post in October. We had a
wonderful time. She feels as though she got a real sense of
living in another country, and gained the ability to really picture our
lives in context here. I had the help and companionship of
another adult in the house without the stress of having to travel or
show off. She did fall down our stairs (the steep ones between
the two main floors, not the very steep ones to the attic or the mega
steep ones to the basement)and spent a good deal of time recovering,
unfortunately. This necessitated more car rides than bike rides
to and from school, and the worsening weather meant that the kids
didn't really object. We spent the week off school lounging
about, though we did head to Efteling
for a day. Efteling was fun, though the first hour was spent in
line for a ride that shut down just after we got to the starting gates,
and the last hour was spent in our car in the parking lot reading the
Phantom Tollbooth waiting for movement. In between times, we
enjoyed multiple roller coasters, overpriced food, and talking garbage
cans.
Halloween was a big deal this year as I helped
organize the big Halloween party at the school. I was one of
three witches to read Halloween stories to kids at the lower school,
and the photographer in the Photo Booth at the Halloween party at the
upper school. I took a couple hundred pictures, most of them of
older kids in fancy dress posing for the camera. Mom helped
decorate the gym and chaperone the party, and A helped out behind the
scenes at the party too, attaching prizes at the spooky fishing
game. We all had a good time, but my feet were killing me by the
end of the evening.
October 30, 2009:
Long
fun
day
at
the
schools
doing
Halloween
party
stuff
from
set-up
and
clean-up
to
reading
stories
to
manning
the
photo
booth
during
the
after-school
party,
but
spent
all of it in witchy get-up that included heels. Ow.
Glad I don't do 9 hours so clad on any regular basis.
B got braces on October 28th. We have another
appointment on
Wednesday to see where we are, but his tooth has visibly turned almost
completely to even with the other teeth. November 1, 2009:
thought she should mention B's new braces before too much longer. He
got them (top only) Wednesday morning, had one bad night of tears (and
a bump in the face) that night, but since then has gotten used to them.
He's still figuring out what he can eat & how, and has been proudly
showing his new smile to everyone.
I turned 40. I've never been one to stress
about birthdays, and this one was pretty nice, too. It's kind of
hard to feel old when your mom's around. I think my forties will
be good years. I made sure to have my mom get pictures of me with
the kids on my birthday, but they ended up getting deleted when I was
trying to make room for a kid's play. I have a hard time getting
to be the subject instead of the photographer, and such mistakes don't
help.
Just after mom went back home, we all got
sick. They were just head colds, and not influenza, but
persistent and nasty, just the same. Overshadowing our own
illnesses, however, was the dog's. Mom left Monday, the dog got
his teeth cleaned on Tuesday, Wednesday he threw up his food, and
Thursday morning he vomited a lot of red blood. A number of vet
visits and consultations ensued. We're not really sure what
happened, why he got sick, or why he got better. Just at the
point where we were ready to brace for another vet visit, he seemed to
turn around and come back to himself. All his systems seemed to
be functioning normally again. We recently took him back in for
his regular shots, and they didn't have his weight in their records
except from April 08, probably the heaviest he's been. Still, we
don't know whether his weight loss has been gradual, or recent, or
continuing. I'll bring him back in for another weighing in a week
or two. Nevertheless, since his tooth cleaning/removal and
getting sick, I've been very aware that he is an elderly dog. I
THINK he's drinking more than before, but I can't really tell. He
doesn't seem to need to go outside with any more frequency or urgency,
and he's not had any other mistakes inside since the blood. He
isn't able to run as far or as fast as he could when he was a young
dog, but that's been true for a while. He still loves to go for
walks and runs off-leash on the heath or in the forest. So I
don't know. I worry about his upcoming trip home, though, and the
12 hours in a crate ordeal. He's a good dog and we are all
unhappy at just the idea of him dying. The worst part of owning a
dog is how short their lifespan is compared to ours.
November 12, 2009:
I
not
happy
with
how
this
week
is
going.
Now
one
of
two
sick
kids
is
feverish,
and
the
dog
just
vomited
blood.
Kids
still
asleep,
dog
won't come out from
under the bed, vet office closed and can't translate their phone
message.... Vet appointment for this afternoon. I hope the dog
emerges
before then. Poor pup thinks he's in trouble. Could use some
help.
Housekeeper's sick today too. The kids would prefer to stay home
over going with me to the vet. If you're willing to be inside with two
coughing kids, that'd help. Thanks Arja, you're fabulous! Dog
went in
and I'm to keep an eye on
him. Beth offered more complete advice so antacids and bland diet
tomorrow it is. I think I'll still give the stinky guy a bath, though,
if it doesn't stress him out too much. November 13, 2009: Dog smells
better after bath, is perkier, and is interested in eating
again. Kids are on the mend, and no more fevers, though still coughing
and home from school. Now to catch up to where I thought I would be
now...
B turned 9 and we had a birthday party. Part
of our birthday
tradition is pictures of kid feet with their dad's reference
feet.
That started with some photos taken of B as a week-old infant.
Another
part is a weighing and measuring of both boys. I measured three
or
four times and finally used a level to confirm that A has now overtaken
B in height as well as weight. They've both grown tremendously,
mind
you, and I burst out in laughter when attacking the mending pile last
week and putting some of the pants in there up against a boy - talk
about high waters! There is not much difference between them
though,
and we'll measure again midway between birthdays for another pencil
mark on the wall. It's not a race, certainly. It's just one
more
reason they're still taken for twins so often.
November 23, 2009:
I
would
rather
take
a
nap
listening
to
the
rain
instead
of
attacking
the
monstrous
list
of
things
that
MUST
BE
DONE
TODAY.
Grumble. The
idea
of
adding
more
to the list (even naps) makes me shudder. It's not
that I don't want to do the things on the list (exactly), but that I
don't want to have to do it all TODAY, and the fear I'm going to drop
one of these juggling balls onto someone's head. (Happy birthday,
kiddo. Splat!)
November 24, 2009:
Birthday
cake
baked,
gluten-free
cookies
made,
party
invitations
sent,
pizza
money
collected
and
tallied,
costumes
for
play
partially
sorted
and
email
out,
chicken
de-boned,
dogs
walked,
ride
for tomorrow
arranged, people fed, photos uploading, and I even got a 1/2 hour nap
after the kids went to bed. I'm pretty sure it was raining.
November is always a busy month for us with two
birthdays to celebrate. I had thought, in the optimism of
September and October, that I might try another NaNoWriMo. In
fact, inspired by a friend's exhortation to a group of laid off folk to
do what you feel compelled to do, I decided to write about the
cafe/used bookstore I have been designing in my head for years. I
had planned to start this after "retirement" and I have a name picked
out, decor, employment policies, et cetera. I started thinking,
though, about what it might take to start this big project "now"
instead of later. I wanted to figure out what I knew, what I
needed to know and didn't, and start going after it. But, I
discovered that first off, November is never going to be my month to
write 50,000 words. Any further participation in NaNoWriMo is
going to have to be in another month and mailing in the daily word
count in sync with whatever month I actually do it in. And
second, if I'm going to write 50,000 words in 30 days, it's going to
have to be a work of fiction. I can't spew non-fiction or write
what I'm researching without an internal editor hard at work. So,
lesson learned. As far as The Well-Read Dish goes, I have some
directions to pursue when I return to the States, and some identified
knowledge to gather. We shall see...
November 4, 2009:
Gah!
Went
upstairs
to
write
and
haven't
yet.
Don't
want
to
get
too
far
behind
on
my
word
count.
(Okay,
I'm
going
already!)
November 5, 2009:
Needs
some
help
with
research.
If
you've
started
your
own
business
(any
sort),
please
drop
me
a
line.
I'm
interested
to
hear
about
any
problems
you
had,
how
you identified the things you needed to know, the
checklists you had of next steps, and the hiccups and surprises you
encountered along the way. Thanks!
November 16, 2009:
Ha.
Well.
It's
on
hold
until
the
Bazaar
is
over.
Maybe
by
then
this
awful
cold
will
have
let
go
of
me
(and
AB&C).
I
haven't
given up
hope completely, but definitely believe that November is not the month
for me to be doing WriMo despite the NaNo part of it. 2 birthdays,
Christmas prep, colds, and (in the States) TG combine for short days.
June was much better.
Ah, yes. Our school holds an annual Christmas
Bazaar in
mid-November, and this year I was a vendor, offering my holiday gift
bags and over 60 jars of grape jelly made up from some (!) of the juice
collected from our backyard grapes. The grape jelly sold well,
but I
didn't get rid of it as thoroughly as I'd hoped. The gift bags
did
pretty well, but I wished I'd had all of my stock with me instead of
just the holiday fabrics; the two Dutch fabric designs I found in
Utrecht sold out, and I think if I had had some wine bags made up
they'd have sold well too. Last week I found a bunch of fabrics
that
would make great gift bags, but put off buying. I think I'll go
back
this week and go for it. I might as well go all in if I'm going
to be
successful at spreading the idea of a nice alternative to disposable
wrapping paper. So, now I have added sewing a few dozen bags and
making jars and jars of jelly to my November tally.
November 17, 2009:
I
am
hating
the
vagaries
of
space
time.
When
I
need
my
husband
to
be
home,
I
don't
want
it
to
take
an
hour.
Teleportation
please.
Whew. I think that's pretty much October and
November. Onward...
What with being newly healthy and homebodies, we didn't go down the
canal to see Sinterklaas arrive this year mid-November. There was
a
lot of foot traffic, but even the appeal of pepernoten cookies was not
enough to rouse the kids from their electronics to brave the
cold. In
fact I think, looking back at last year, we just happened upon the same
spectacle on our walk along the canal and joined in a bit. We
didn't
do any shoe gifts this year either, though we did celebrate the day
(December 6) with the traditional chocolate letters. A and B were
white chocolate, and N & C were dark chocolate, and we were all
happy. Oh hey. I still have some N left. Hmmm.
One of our cherished holiday traditions is the
advent calendar. We
have the one my mom made ages ago, with the 11 and 12 reversed; like
her, I made a bunch and gave them away years ago as well. It has
a
large green felt tree on the front and numbered pockets with a felt
ornament in each. We always have the partridge on the first, the
pear
on the second, the star on the 24th, and the kids rotate which year
they are odd or even. The correct child gets to pull out the felt
ornament and place it on the tree, distribute the small treat evenly,
and read the card. It's the card that they like the best (and is
sometimes the hardest part for the busy mom). It spells out an
activity to do together as a family on that day. We usually have
take
our family card photo in there, play dreidel with M&Ms on the first
night of Hannukah, light all the candles on the solstice, and all
school and other scheduled holiday activities get placed appropriately,
of course.
This year we had a lot of those, it seemed.
School celebrations
for Sinterklaas, each child performed in a class play, there was a
Scout holiday potluck, a school dinner/singing performance, and I had a
staff lunch too. The kids' plays went well. A played an
earthling in
a play about their
unit of inquiry, and B was a narrator in a performance of the Green
Wolf. They both did great. Part of the Sinterklaas
celebration here
is a surprise ("su PREEZE"), which consists of a small (5 euro) gift,
elaborately wrapped - often in paper mache - and accompanied by a poem
that can refer to their bad habits or foibles. Very Dutch.
We had
four of these to do this year - C had one for work, B one for school,
and both A and B one for Scouts. In addition to the shopping
expedition for the small gifts, I wrote one poem and helped with the
paper mache on three. B had a great time with the poem part,
especially, and wrote some masterful limericks. Paper mache
creations
included an artist's palette, a pair of flip flops, and a nearly three
foot tall musical note. Since the tradition is that you don't
reveal
the giver of the gift and the recipient has to guess, the viewing for
parents at the school is a bit frustrating, at least for me, because
you can't tell what belongs to who, or whose work is on display.
I
guess I'd like to be a part of the opening and guessing part too.
Maybe this tradition is something we can take home with us, and the
boys can do something for each other.
December 7, 2009:
House
decorated,
snowflakes
hung,
tree
up
and
festooned,
Sinterklaas
over,
advent
calendar
in
action.
Still
to
come:
the
Christmas
photo
(after
the
Movember
'stache
is
shaved),
school
plays,
dinners at Scouts and
school, vacation. Oh, and gifts.
December 11, 2009:
Of
COURSE
it's
more
complicated
to
comprehensively
organize
a
life
than
a
library.
That's
why
it's
easier
to
stay
and
do
inventory
than
tackle
my
IMAP
gmail
iTouch
Outlook Christmas-card address-list Fotki-tag blog
and communication issues. And why I'm here instead of Alt Tabbed.
Ah
but my point is that the library is approaching "done" while my life
organization is a total mess. December
14,
2009: It's not really a contest, or even a ranking on
some imaginary
objective "organized" scale; the problem is living up to one's own
ideals. And my expectations for myself are always higher than for
others in my life.
My laptop failure and iTouch acquisition in November
meant that I
really wanted to get our address list in shape for this year's holiday
greeting cards. But (of course) I wanted to do it "right."
"Right"
meant that I needed to pull all of our existing data from our Excel
spreadsheet, and from my Palm calendar, and from Facebook, and from
e-mail messages, and from bits of paper and old Christmas cards.
"Right" meant wrestling with a program that was designed as a business
app rather than to do what I wanted it to do, just so we could share
data between each other and all our respective electronic
devices.
"Right" meant a separate entry for everyone in each family so I could
have a comprehensive birthday list. "Right" took me a long
time. And
I know I don't have everything right, and I'm still forgetting folks,
and some data I'm sure is wrong, but at least the corrected and revised
information all has one place to go now. And the New Year's
letter is
written, attached to the family photo, and starting to make its way to
its recipients, at least in North America so far.
Just before Christmas was also the time I
essentially fired our
housekeeper. And awkward as it was (carried out in text messages
which
morphed from her discovery at my paying her only for the work she'd
been doing to "Vase broken dog and you know!I cant beliewe how with
people i was working!This money pick up somebody els!Nice Christmans
and Happy 2010 year!"), oh my heavens, what a RELIEF it was! I
hadn't
quite realized how stressful it was to have her come in and
clean. How
much I suddenly didn't have to do just in preparation of her coming
(like hiding the dish sponges, or buying chemicals I wasn't sure I
wanted used). How much I hated not knowing if I was going to come
home
to a clean house or a text message about why she couldn't come because
her sister was sick in Poland. How frustrating it was that she
thought
she knew what I was saying when she clearly hadn't listened. How
glad
I was to be done with her. And, yes, there was some ambivalence
there
about paying someone to do something I could just as easily do, but it
was definitely exacerbated by the fact that I could do it so much
better than she did (which is why I did the dishes before she came, and
vacuumed before guests arrived). So, the house has been a bit
messier
this year, but it has been a lot more comfortable.
And Christmas is also when C initiated our family
after-dinner
clean up. Every night (barring an exceptionally light load) the
whole
family puts dinner away, clears and wipes the table, and does the
dishes. It's fantastic. The kids are surprisingly unwhiny
about it
all, and get a real kick out of discovering every night that there
aren't really all that many dishes to do - and when there are, they
split them up, or happily rinse and stack instead of wash. I
think the
only remaining hurdles, really, are a firm pick it up and put it away
habit in place of drop it where it's convenient or get it out and go to
something else, and the bathrooms. Oy, the bathrooms.
Doesn't seem
fair that the one who never misses AND has a keen sense of smell does
the rubber gloves, hands and knees work. There is definitely room
for
improvement with the rest of the house, but I'm still incredibly happy
with our new after dinner habit.
Christmas itself was very nice. The boys were
both keen to get up
early and open presents. A had quickly cottoned on to the hook in
the
"open one present Christmas Eve" idea, complained that he didn't want a
new pair of pajamas, and tried to wiggle into opening a different
present, but we held firm. As has been the case since we've been
here,
no one came to visit and we didn't travel anywhere for Christmas, so it
was just our family for Christmas stockings, breakfast, and gifts.
December 24, 2009:
The
rain
is
making
serious
inroads
on
our
snowy
blanket.
It's
a
race
now
between
the
rain
and
the
boys,
who
want
to
get
up
astonishingly
early
to
open gifts. Merry Christmas everyone, green OR white!
The boys won, even though, fortunately, they didn't
get up as early
as they wanted. It has been white here for most of the last two
months. Cold too. Climate change. I know it's still
mid-winter, but
I'm ready for a change myself. I have noticed that our days are
getting lighter again, though. Hooray! Today it was not
full dark at
5:30 pm, or when my alarm went off this morning. I will be glad
to be
those few degrees further south next winter.
After Christmas we went a few degrees south
ourselves, and visited Rome over the New Year. December 26, 2009:
Please help, local peeps! We need dog-sitting from the 28th til the 1st
while we're in Rome. Any help or ideas gladly welcomed!
Rome was very nice. None of us had been
before. We got a hotel
with a pool, which helped the boys deal with leaving their new presents
and comforts of home. We enjoyed our tour of the Coliseum so much
that
we rejoined our guide for the Vatican the next day. A got lost in
the
Vatican museum for about 15 minutes despite the radios, but was
recovered without too much trauma. This was put into perspective
somewhat when C pried open the closing doors of the metro car and
pulled a quick B out to rejoin his family. We had a couple of
discussions of What to Do If... We enjoyed the city and the
somewhat
warmer temperatures, saw a few fireworks reflected off the airport
windows behind a pillar, and came home to the pets safe and sound.
January 3, 2010:
We
had
a
very
nice
time
in
Rome.
The
dog
and
cat
seem
to
have
weathered
our
absence
just
fine.
New
Year's
Eve
can
be
pretty
explosive here, but
no one mentioned a problem. (Of course, the relevant parties are
animals and a teenage boy with limited English and a house down the
street, so who knows... Perhaps instead of hiding under the bed, the
pets played poker.) The cat's small enough to
travel but hates it and the
dog loves the car and has only flown the 10+ hour ordeal to get here. I
think we know about more options for pet care than we did before this
vacation's panic, so that's a bonus.
One of the things we did while in Rome was get the
kids their own e-mail addresses. January
4,
2010:
Recently got the kids their own e-mail accounts and is very happy
they're spelling, typing and having a ball sending messages (often
across the room). And it's a lot of fun to send e-mail signed
"mom."
Very much a good thing, I think. I'm trying to find the right
balance
between the privacy of their own conversations and concern about what
they could get into with the help of some ill-meaning folks.
That's a
mom's road, though, and I'm not particularly worried that I'm walking
it this early with them. I'm not sure why I've never taken to
heart
any of the messages from fear mongers about internet predators or the
need for filters and consors, except that I'm always skeptical about
those peddling fear for profit or thrills and believe strongly in the
ability of anyone to discern crap from non-crap given a wide (rather
than narrow) choice of reading material. I don't mean that I'm
blithely letting them sail about undirected, but I do hope that the
right knowledge about their own boats and the rocks and shoals I know
about will help them avoid some dangers and know when to ask for help
with others.
This begins the second week in a row that C has been
away all
week. At least this week he's in the same time zone. Cat,
dog, kids,
cleaning, and school have all been left to me for a bit.
Wrestling at
night helps with the kids. And I've been keeping a sleep diary,
which
has helped somewhat, or at least has illuminated why I really really
need to go to bed with the kids on one night and shouldn't expect to
get up as early as my first alarm. The pets, however, have no
respect
for such things as my need for sleep.
January 14, 2009:
Teaching
the
cat
to
meow
instead
of
scratch.
So
she
meows,
I
get
up
to
let
her
out,
sick
or
not.
Except
she
wants
a
treat
like
the dog, which I gave
her earlier. Apparently since I wouldn't normally be in bed at this
time, it's now her job to get me up... to give her treats. Cats!
January 17, 2009:
I
was
just
going
to
send
a
couple
of
messages
before
I
went
to
bed
and
here
it
is
three
hours
later.
Ah,
the
power
of
the
internet to suck sleep
from my life. Can't blame it on C's absence since it just as often
happens when he's next to me.
Volunteer work turned into paid work
(supposedly) Of course, at this rate, it's likely that I won't
get paid until after I've finished the cataloguing and full inventory
of every book, tape, and poster in the library. Nevertheless, I'm
considered staff instead of an uber-volunteer, and am invited to staff
functions, and have hours I'm supposed to keep. Given my progress
at the big projects that have been keeping me at the library (this is
my first school day not working this month), I believe I can actually
start being at the library for just those hours. Then I can spend
my time getting the rest of my life organized and up to speed.
This
monster post was just the next thing on my list. I have a number
of
languishing bits of correspondence to tackle next. And pictures
to
tag. And the hand-sewing to finish off (pun not intended, but
recognized as funny; it's late now and punny's funny). And and
and...
And it's now very late and I still have some steps
to go through
before I can post this thing. And I want to do that and go to
bed.
So. I'm mostly pretty much caught up. I'll try to remember
today if
ever I consider letting it slide for this long again. I hope that
it
will be relatively easy again now that everything is in place.
Peace,