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October 6, 2009

I am inordinately proud I washed the dishes right after dinner the last two nights in a row. A consummately skilled dish-stacker (as roomies can attest), I was pleased at how fast it went when I didn't have a week's worth. Seriously, I can stack a week's worth of pans, cutting boards, utinsels, plastic containers, and bowls in a tiny space such that it doesn't LOOK like there are all that many dishes to do. But they keep coming at you. I can stack them clean in a tiny space too (all good since I'm in a tiny kitchen at the moment), balanced precariously against each other and requiring a bit of Sokoban to get the dry dishes out of the pile the next day. So I've been getting the satisfaction of having NO dishes to do to the right of my sink several nights running. Way too dang soon to call it a habit, but the possibility of it being one is now more than simply a fantastical intellectual exercise. When I was growing up, the four of us would split after-dinner chores such that one of us washed, one rinsed, one dried, and one wiped and swept. Rinsing, obviously, was the most desirable, though we also had the responsibility of quality control. This wasn't as much of an issue after dinner as it was when dad washed dishes without his contacts in. It was a very enjoyable way to get the dishes done, and between actually working together and the Free To Be You And Me song "Housework," it's always been something I wanted to do together when I had a family of my own. We've tried a few times to get something going. The closest we got was the kids rotating wiping the table and sweeping or vacuuming under the table. Sometimes they wanted to help do dishes, but the time it took to do the big pile was too much for them to get to the end of.

comments?

October 5, 2009

I succeeded in making a bunch of calls (which I hate doing, especially here) and setting up dentists, docs, and window repair folks. A great weight has fallen off my back. Getting through some of the hardest parts of my to do list really makes the rest of it seem achievable. It reveals the light there at the end of the tunnel. My niece posted recently that she has everything on her to do list done for the first time in her life. I can't quite imagine such a situation for myself. There is too much that I add whenever it is no longer overwhelming; there are so many fun possibilities I commit myself to, if only in my head.

comments?

they don't eat you, the worst that can happen is that you get someone who's English is as bad as mine :-) and your Dutch is improving as well so they "kunnen je niet voor de gek houden"
(BJ, 10/5/09)

Your English is by far not the worst we've encountered on the phone.
Unfortunately, our Dutch is not yet good enough to do more than guess when the fast talking voice mail message plays.
(C, 10/5/09)

next entry

October 3, 2009

    I really like cooking with C. Tonight we combined to make Chicken Teriyaki, Rice, Spinach with Asian Spices, and Beet Roesti. Yum! Plus, while he cleaned up, I put the bones on the stove for chicken stock and put up three batches of grape jelly. Oh yeah, and before dinner made 40 days worth of dog treats.   Also today the boys had a soccer game, the first with A playing keeper, and C and I spent our requisite volunteer day helping out in the club's front office - each of us watched one half of the game. B played mid-field and created a lot of opportunities that the team couldn't convert into a score, but did a lot to keep the game on the opposing team's field, preventing A from having much work to do. End score was nil-nil. Afterwards, the boys had a playdate, so C and I shopped for groceries, played, and worked alongside each other until they came home. C worked on expense reports and I on class mum stuff. Full day. Nice day.
    Yesterday was the sixteenth anniversary of the First Annual Car-Painting, Tie-Dying, Ethnic-Food Pot-Lucking, Game-Playing Extravaganza. My roommates and I hosted a very fine party, and I met C, who brought a chicken curry and played an impressive game of hearts. Sixteen short years later and here we are together: a family of four tie-dyed, dedicated gamers who cook together and host (but own no painted cars - that's always been the difficult one). Thanks, love. I adore making my life together with you.
    We recently got a new Wii game: Pro Evolution Soccer (PES) 2009. I'm very impressed with how it looks and feels to me as an observer while AB&C play. I love the announcers, the crowd noise, the replays, and the player reactions to near-misses and getting a red or yellow card. It looks and feels like a real broadcasted football match. I can't speak to game play, but the idea was to get the boys some better ideas about how to play the game, and they really do seem to be learning techniques, rules, and strategies as they're having fun. C played his first game last night and had so many players red-carded that the match was forfeited in the middle. A said C really needed to learn to slide-tackle, but I think he meant to slide-tackle without fouling.
    In less than two weeks, my mom is coming out to stay for a month. We're all very excited. Lots to do in preparation. Since I've got a morning commitment every day except Monday next week, I'm glad that tomorrow is still the weekend. Now to get to bed so tomorrow is a nice, full, satisfying day too.

comments?

Wow! You're super productive! That dinner sounds great, but did the kids eat it? I have the worst trouble getting mine to eat anything with spices or "green stuff". Any suggestions?
(Melissa, 10/4/09)

They had corn instead of beets or greens, but they both love chicken teriyaki. I'd suggest just keep offering different foods and gently encourage they try new things (with stories of how tastes -including yours- change over time). If they're really not eating anything green make sure they get a multi-vit. Know that super tasters (it is genetic... Read More) are often sensitive to texture as well as tastes like bitter, and try foods in different preparations (like raw or frozen peas instead of boiled). Ignore advice that makes you feel cruel or causes your kids to have a negative relationship to food, which can last a lifetime. Mostly, don't stress too much about it.
(No, 10/4/09)

September 24, 2009

A is now a proud Cub Scout and B couldn't wait to finish his homework story - something so clearly inspired by a Bill Cosby sketch (ICEcream!) that it prompted a discussion about plagiarism. And I replaced the light in the bathroom so all is bright again.

comments?

Is "inspired by" classed as plagiarism??!
(Jax 9/25/09)

Ah, yes. Children trying out the points of view of those not-their-family and feeling that voice as their own. As a teacher, I would discuss what they wrote as tho it their voice--and sometimes it truly was! How do we learn afterall?
(mom, 9/25/09)

We did emphasize to him that he didn't need to change anything in his story and that what he did was fine, but it inspired talk about the act of creation and subsequent ownership of that creation. I hope he understood from our discussion that using another person's idea or talking in others' characters' voices was okay, but that taking someone else's words verbatim was not.
(No, 9/26/09)

September 22, 2009

Our grapes produced a mighty harvest this year compared to last. I have 22 peanut butter jars full of juice in the freezer, 7 quart jars and 28 pasta sauce jars (450 ml) vacuum sealed on the shelf and 6 1/2 jars of jelly made. So that's a total of 33 quarts of juice this year. Last year I got only 4. The plan is to make lots of jelly and sell it at the Christmas Bazaar (and give away what won't sell) as well as make juice popsicles and drink grape juice throughout the year. My biggest problem is that I'm out of jars. I need to have more pasta with red sauce just so I can turn the jars of juice into jars of jelly. I'm thinking I will move to the pectin sugar they sell here once I get close to using up my imported pectin supply as well. Took a few photos for a label as well; the grapes were really beautiful this year, plump purple globes thick and heavy on the vine... if they were seedless grapes there wouldn't have been nearly as many for juicing. My pruning can't take all the credit; I'm sure that the weather contributed to the difference in harvests as well. I certainly hope so, because I'm not sure who (if anyone) will be here to harvest in September next year and it's nearly pruning time again.

comments?

You see, life in Holland is good - you need to stay another few years!
(Jax, 9/22/09)

But then translate measures to metric!!! :-)
(Joep, 9/22/09

Very impressive!!!
(Barb F., 9/22/09)

That's a lot of juice, No! Well done! Any wine-making plans afoot?
(Ericka, 9/24/09)

Perhaps if I actually drank wine, it might compel me to try my hand at it, but since I don't, I find other uses. Wine's a little more time intensive than a cheesecake (though, come to think of it, it's been ages since I made anything I don't like to eat - cutting slices of Gouda for B is as close as I get nowadays).
(No, 9/24/09)

Wish we were there to help you enjoy the grapes and product. Suppose you can't fly to FL with grape jelly. ENJOY.
(Sue, 9/24/09)

Wow, that is a big harvest. Did you plant anything else this year?
(Veronica, 9/25/09)

Peas the kids picked clean and some zucchini I grew to sizes you can't find in grocery stores for zucchini bread. Herbs. Oh, and I dug some potatoes once from the sandbox where I'd stashed some sprouting spuds some months earlier. So, not much, really.
(No, 9/26/09)

September 14, 2009

Extra Dutch classes have started for the boys (you know, so they can talk to each other in a secret language). Swimming, soccer, drama, Scouts. Now they have only two afternoons free from extracurriculars (until art starts up again). Still, busier makes us all happier than our first six month here without any of that. Can you still call me a soccer mom if we go everywhere on bikes instead of in a minivan?

comments?

only if you wear jeans and a loose sweat shirt :)
would you like us to speak Dutch with the boys?
(Arja, 9/22/09)

Sure, and having your conversation be secret from C and me might help too.
(No, 9/24/09)

Of course! You are a Mom and you attend to the soccer boys' practices & games; doesn't matter the mode of transportation. Would B&A teach me some Dutch, especially nouns or easy expressions...although I won't get the right pronunciation without hearing it :[
(Sue, 9/24/09)

September 7, 2009

    Cool crisp day, sharp and warm in the sun, but cool in the shade. The seasons are turning. Feels like fall. The sky isn't light when my alarm goes off. The kids don't need their shades pulled to go to sleep. Leaves are collecting on the ground. The grapes are sweeter and riper and insisting that I need to harvest and juice them very soon. Peaches and corn need to follow me home into my basement too. And I need to take my three cricket bat zucchinis in to be grated (by hand, unfortunately) and frozen as well. Spare time. Right.
    We were in Berlin this past weekend, the four of us. The dog was retrieved today, and the cat is just now forgiving us, after a long night of scratching at the window despite the open door two feet away, and flitting in and out every few seconds to prove she could. Spent a lot of our time in Berlin sleeping and feeling wiped out, but did get out to see some of the city, and the zoo was enjoyed by all. Then we flew home and left C behind for the week.
    Time feels funny when C's away on business. Slower and faster somehow. I am hoping to do a better job at going to bed without him around than I did last week when he was in Italy. Last night fell somewhere in between ideal and disastrous. When I was little, my brother and I used to take inordinate pride in cleaning while mom and dad were away. I still have the desire to get lots done while I am alone, but this is counteracted by many things. So many decisions are made for stupid reasons, in my life as well as all others, in politics, in sports, in games. As always, I work better if I have a plan mapped out ahead of time. Tonight: Quicken, computer catch-up. Tuesday: volunteer in the morning, more finances and computer work, groceries, grapes. Wednesday: library work, swimming, voetbal, writing. Thursday: Cleaning, C comes home, Scouts. It looks manageable here. I know things will crop up and balloon into bigger projects than I think they ought. Dutch tutoring and drama begin next week. Well, the kids' lights out time is in a few minutes. They have moved on from our Fox Trot and Calvin and Hobbes collections and are trying out the ones we have fewer of: One Big Happy and Rose is Rose are their reading books of choice tonight.

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September 2, 2009

    I have blogged in the meantime. Just last week I had composed a nice long post while the kids were at soccer practice. Then one of the kids on the team came up to me and asked me to tie his shoes. I quickly put the computer on the ground next to me and when I picked it up again it had shut off. Blast. I turned it on again just on the off chance that it hadn't completely disappeared, but the program I use doesn't autosave. All gone.
    To sum up: School started the 19th. B loves his new (male) teacher and enjoys his humor. A had a week of substitutes while his regular teacher was off in the States for a wedding, and is glad she is back. I have been working hard in the library. Pulling hundreds of books for the various classes' new units and getting the library ready for the year. Class mom work has been pretty intensive at the beginning of the year as well. C and I celebrated our anniversary (the starting point of my blog last week) with fourteen years. Voetbal/soccer has started up, and the first game this last Saturday was a 2-1 win with B scoring both goals. We had a houseguest one weekend. C left during the soccer match last weekend for Italy and just got back last night. We head off for a weekend in Berlin on Friday and leave C there to work the rest of the week.
    To get detailed: Yesterday after school came home and B did his spelling before joining A on the computers. I did some computer e-mail work related to class mom stuff. Emptied the dishwasher. Made Indian spiced salmon with mango and noodles for dinner. C came home from Italy and went to work and so came home just before dinner but was on the phone with work until the rest of us had started and were fifteen minutes from leaving. Left for the school's Parent Information Evening. Kids played while we listened to headmaster and teachers explain their goals and method of working for the year. Came home and fed the boys ice cream and cookies then ran them upstairs for flossing, brushing and rinsing. It was too late for a full chapter of The Secret Garden, but they wrestled with their daddy and we read a few pages of Silly Poems before they went to sleep. Came downstairs and watched an espisode of CSI and sorted music at the same time, finishing up the file I was working on while C fell asleep. Went upstairs to bed. Woke up to loud meows and came downstairs to let the cat in. Climbed back in bed and checked my phone/alarm clock for the time: 5:06. It started beeping it was out of batteries, knew I wouldn't be able to sleep with it beeping in my ear, so traipsed downstairs again for the charger, disappointing the dog once again by not giving him his morning treat. My alarm went off at six. C's went off at his 6:00 several minutes later. Got up and went downstairs to work on my e-mail. A came downstairs and we snuggled for a while. I made scones and eggs because we were completely out of peanut butter. A asked, "Why don't we have any peanut butter?" C had time for eggs before he left for work. Herded kids to school after packing only their snack (we were completely out of fresh fruit as well - stuck half a carrot in their snackboxes). In the garage A asked why I hadn't yet pumped up the tires of the next bike up so he and his brother could go to larger tires. Dropped A off and swung back to B's school and then back to A's. Did the parental social dance and biked home. Ran to the grocery store and bought much. Came home and put food away and made three lunches, giving myself the salvaged and shaved bits of apple that came back unwanted in lunchboxes. Biked to schools and collected boys and sat behind the bench with A where the wind blew leaves into our faces, but we were apparently safe from bandits. B has to hide his lunches as well; apparently I pack appealing food. Biked home. Biked to swimming. Called the landlord about a repair bill they sent to us. Typed some here. My alarm clock reminded me about dinner. Made nuggets and fries for the kids. C and I will have leftovers after the game.

    Ha. Meant to demonstrate only that I was running from one thing to the other and feeling unable to get all the small stuff. Only managed to keep it from being published as I had to pass on to the next urgent thing before I could finish here. Now it's five days later. sigh.

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August 19, 2009

Was planning on blogging tonight, but am deciding to postpone it and go to bed at a reasonable hour so tomorrow I can have another great day like today. Got lots done and kids felt like they "crammed 48 hours into 24" what with first day of school, swimming, voetbal, and strawberry shortcake.

comments?

Great household management if aalll that with happy kids too.
(mom, 8/20/09)

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August 4, 2009

    I find it a little ironic that I have to work so hard to get my kids to write. At least we got in some practice today, but the advertisement to tempt the Jawa to buy the Lego droid they built is going to have to wait until tomorrow. Today I tried to get the kids to do a bit of school prep, with mixed results. Yesterday I found my laptop turning off on me unexpectedly so decided to tackle a non-computer project - sorting through all the piles of schoolwork and memorabelia from the past 19 months. Looking at some of A's writing work made me a little anxious. I want his new teacher to fully appreciate how intelligent he is, and I think the state of his writing may be detrimental to that cause. In addition, I'm getting a bit tired of the Star Wars music from the Lego game. So I told them that today we would be doing something else. A came in this morning excited about "our" school, but half an hour later, after playing (Lego Star Wars, of course), he didn't want to stop and "wasn't hungry!" for breakfast. B was more willing to stay excited about the fun stuff I had planned.
    Since I just couldn't force myself to get on the road in time to run before C left this morning at 6:30, I tried running with the dog and the kids on bikes. We got about halfway around the loop I had mapped and I was catching up after a forced stop for dog business when I found A crying hysterically after a fall and badly scraped knee. B went home for the bandage A insisted on, my iPod helpfully told me that I had stopped moving, and I got into a discussion about how much blood is in a body while I held the seat and pushed A home. They read while I showered.
    Then, oh the pain: writing. I explained my version of a reading program (new book earned with every 20 books read, or every 5 books with a 4 sentence book review) and we came up with a fun acronym for it together. WARP SPEED = Welcome to A's Reading Program, Securing the Purchase of Educational or Entertaining Dramas. This involved much spinning and giggling because B came up with BURP SPEED = B's Unusual Reading Program. Spinning Pedestrians Encounter Einstein's Dog. B wanted to do creative writing, so I came up with a jumping off sentence for him. He was stuck for a while as I dealt with A, finally suggested his own sentence, and went upstairs to try to work away from us. Still only got most of the way through that same sentence by the time he came down wanting to do what I was trying to get A to do. I really was trying to start small. Name, date, alphabet, numerals, and one sentence about one of the books he had just read. I wrested all but the sentence out of him when he suggested what we'd done before where he fills in the beginnings of words that have the same endings. So I found 19 words that ended in ICK but wanted him to write the ICK as well, which he refused to do. Sigh.
    I moved on to lunch and music and we grooved to Captain Vegetable - crunch, crunch, crunch! They built droids and got stuck on the writing again. B worked on an art project while I re-evaluated where we were as compared to where I'd hoped to be, decided to abandon math and science for tomorrow, and let them play while I made dinner.
    I know that I could be writing more visibly, and that might help, but it's not like they don't know I'm writing. And the other morning when I was in bed writing A's birthday poem, B wanted to write one too, but only got as far as rhyming "despite" before he abandoned his effort. So if an example isn't the problem, and the value of the written word isn't at issue, perhaps their hesitation is from something else. Maybe they are getting criticism from somewhere. Maybe my concern is working against me. Maybe I'm over-thinking this and it will all work out in time. Hope so. I will continue finding things for them to write that are a part of their day or fun for them.   I will continue writing in front of them but try not to take writing over from them. And, as A pointed out, he (and B) are "already ready for group 4" (and 5) and they will be just fine. Mostly the day was exhausting and I'm mighty glad I get to have help with the teaching of my kids from some competent folk.

comments?

ask them to write an essay about the droids they built :)
(Arja, 8/5/09)

How are the Lego droids?
(Veronica, 8/11/09)

Parenting
No, I have some experience I would share if asked.
Love you much,
(mom, 8/5/09)

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August 2, 2009

    A had his birthday. He's had presents, cake, candles, poem, photos, been measured and sung to, but he hasn't had a party with friends (summer isn't the best time for finding friends here), so it's not over yet. If you count the parenting of each child separately (not for any good reason I can think of, but just for argument's sake), then I have been a mom for 15 years now. The two kids are now negotiating (not always smoothly) the dual playing of A's favorite birthday present, Lego Star Wars for the Wii. All three of my boys have a save file and has charge of the play on their own file. All three of them are also really enjoying the game. For that matter, I have found that my photo processing has been slowed when I'm in the same room as the game playing even when there aren't any struggles because I enjoy watching the play as well. We did well in choosing it, and it even came to the door on the day of his birthday.
    Today is a day for writing, though the rain makes me wish that I didn't have such a long run in the sun yesterday that my hips started to feel a bit too loose to chance a run today as well. I guess I could take the dog out for a walk, though he probably wouldn't enjoy the rain as much as I would. Ah well, I'm sure today isn't the last day of rain this summer!

    Our rules for kid screen time changed a few months ago. Our original system was giving the kids each poker chips which they could then spend on screen time at 1/2 hour per chip. They got three chips per day with a maximum store of one week's worth. It worked well from the time they were just starting out playing computer games like Putt Putt and even for a while here after the addition of the tv and the Wii. But more and more struggles over chips and C and I's use of our own screens combined for a re-think on my part. I decided to look at what I wanted their relationship to computers and televisions to be as adults. I want them to be able to use these without being trapped by them. I want them to notice when they are starting to get frustrated or exasperated. I want them to recognize in their own bodies and minds when they need to take a break, when they need to use the bathroom, eat, sleep, look at something far away, or run around. I want them to be able to live with their tools in balance with the other things in their lives. So... if they are getting enough time reading, exercising, and playing, and if they are not fighting each other, or forgoing food, homework, or bathroom breaks, then they can play. They still need reminders, and they understand that this is still a trial, but so far it seems to be working out okay.

    I am looking forward to sharing some of my favorite movies with the boys. They are getting to the age where more films are actually appropriate for their viewing. We have yet to get our system set up to watch region 2 DVDs (though I think that is on our list), and we miss NetFlix, so my plans may wait another year to really blossom, but I'd like to organize a regular movie night where we watch films together from a list of our favorites and other appropriate but new to us flicks. And, of course, I'd like to invite others to join us. So, I need to get a list together and make sure it's graduated to allow for the kids' age, interests, and abilities. C doesn't like popcorn, but the kids and I do. The kids and I went and watched G-Force in the theaters this past week and B watched Hotel for Dogs, Monsters vs Aliens, and most of Shampoo on the plane. It is clear that they are older and better able to handle more films than they've seen as well as the theater experience (big, loud, enveloping). I'm rather excited. It's always good to have another person in the house who understands and appreciates iocane powder.

comments? next entry

July 24, 2009

We're back home after three weeks of vacation encompassing 6 cities, 4 languages, 3 forms of currency, and 2 pair of socks for me. Yesterday both kids' favorite thing was "getting home" with enough exclamation points to fill the line. B's favorite thing today was "being home." I don't know if I'm much closer to a satisfactory definition of what "home" is yet, but I know 3 weeks is too long without it for us four. The problem is that "home" is such a graduated concept. Sometimes it is sufficient to be simply where you sleep (hotels count), or where you can do laundry (mom's or house-swapping friends'), sometimes it's enough to be familiar (Seattle grocery stores) or speak the same language (Florida airport) and sometimes it's not home until your family and pets are able to sit together with your stuff around you (our house in NL) or where every part of you is comfortable. Robert Frost wrote “Home is the place where, when you have to go there, / They have to take you in.”/“I should have called it / Something you somehow haven’t to deserve.” in The Death of the Hired Man. We have those homes too. We are truly rich in the number of homes that we have. And when we are on vacation, expecially, someone asking us where we're from can throw us into a confusion of answers. But our family seems to need more home than other families; needs more time home with each other doing not much of anything special. In many ways it seems odd to us to be the ones in Europe for three years. If you divide a country like the Netherlands up into the folks who stay home and the world-travelers, we would probably end up with the homebodies. Still, here we are. We made a home here. I should take more credit: I have made us a home here. This is home. And so is Seattle. In a little over a year I will be realigning those two. I hope to make the best out of what I've learned, take the best of what I've known in different homes and put it in my own. Truth is, we are always making our home more our own. Though I doubt that "being home" will make the kids' nightly favorite again. And, yes, I sure could have used another couple pairs of socks.

I notice that I'm limited in the number of characters I have available in a Facebook "post" so I figure there will be more times when I will write there and continue it here. Kind of reassuring to know that it's not going to completely consume my life. I think.

comments?

Glad you made it back. I'll bet the pets are also glad you are back.
(Paul, 7/24/09)

The cat especially. She's been unusually affectionate today. I think the dog rather enjoys the kennel, though.
(No, 7/25/09)

Our cats are always more affectionate after we have been away for days. Especially our white fluffy one.
(Betsy, 7/25/09)

I'll bet the dog was cleaning up at the nightly poker games.
(Paul, 7/25/09)

Nah, poker's not his game. He prefers Phase 10 or Settlers - something where the other dogs can't tell if he's bluffing.
(No, 7/25/09)

July 22, 2009

    I've just spent a couple hours on Facebook signing up and going through the exhausting let's-find-some-of-my-friends business that joining entails. I understand why people start seeing significance in the squiggly words you are given to verify humanity; that's what our brains do best after all, is to see patterns in noise. I'm not at all sure about adding another place to keep up with in addition to my e-mail, but it may work out for the best. I have high hopes for a schedule and routine to impose on the kids and myself which includes daily time for computer work. I have physical evidence of my previous ability to adhere to habits and practice doing something almost every day, so if I can just get back into the groove, I think I can make it work. And it will be better for all of us. I know that January first is the traditional beginning of new plans and resolutions; but somehow it seems that the beginnings of spring and summer inspire more of my personal improvement projects. I'll let you know how it goes.
    Vacation is close to an end. That is, we crammed Seattle and Spokane together for a too-quick 12 day whirl (and no, I didn't get organized in time to let everyone know we were coming in time to see them) and then flew on C's 40th birthday to continue our tour through northern Germany and then Denmark. Poor man; the best that can be said of it, I guess, is that it was mercifully short since we flew 10 hours towards the sun. I have a couple of ideas for how to celebrate after the fact, but they will have to wait for our return home. We're still in Copenhagen and tomorrow will be spent coming home. We are all four ready to be done with traveling. A is dog-sick and wishes his birthday next week was during the school year so celebrating was easier. I am ready for my own bed and a larger choice of shoes than my running shoes or my almost blown-out Keen flip-flops. C is ready to be home so he can recover over the weekend in preparation for returning to work. B wants to be home but also wants to spend the day at Tivoli; he hates feeling like he's missing out. Two days at Legoland were not enough for his fun-fair tastes. I think Efteling is in our future, but only after my body recovers from the near-constant heavy backpack, camera, and walking around that's been the norm for the last almost three weeks. There are three weeks more of summer vacation for the kids and I before school starts up again.

    Going back to the States made me realize how much I am looking forward to returning to the Seattle Public Library. All those books! In English! And you can request them! I don't have to buy them to read them! As we did last year as well, I signed the kids up for the summer reading program and had them read a quick 10 books before the end of our stay. A picked out a Pokemon book as his free book (and B Little Wolf's Book of Badness) and later asked me if there was a "winter reading program?" I promised him I would happily purchase the next book in the series for him. I'm thinking 20 books or 5 books with a 4 sentence book review earns them a new book. Dad's wife sent a handful of books home with me, and my brother lent me one that has taken his fancy enough to re-read it several times in anticipation of the next book in the trilogy. Yup, I did. I actually started a book in a series that hasn't yet been completed. Enjoyed it too. My hard and fast rule about not doing such a thing has taken a beating in the last couple years. There are so MANY series (or at least authors with repeating characters I like) that I am in the middle of, sometimes with little hope of getting the next one anytime soon, that it has dulled the pain of starting the blasted Wheel of Time series and having the author die without finishing his story. What I'd like is a good database combined with a notification service for the authors I like so I can keep up with what I've read and what I need to catch up on when I return to my beloved library.
    The other thing I thought was odd was how Seattle grew so much while I was away this past year. When we moved back to Seattle after living in the Bay Area, it had shrunk. In California I was in the car driving half an hour, an hour, to go nearly anywhere. So in Seattle suddenly hikes were closer, trips across the lake were trivial, and driving distances was no big deal. But this month, when we were swapping houses with Seattle friends (they left our house empty today), going across town was an excursion. The places that weren't within walking or biking distance were suddenly very far away, at least in my head. I think distances will recalibrate to some Seattle norm after a while living there again, but I do want to continue using my bike as a yardstick. I suspect I will get more familiar with the hills in my area (and not just the ones I already know well from running kids to Montessori and elementary school in the jogger).
    I also hope very much that I can manage never to cram a Seattle and Spokane visit into one whirlwind again. It was hard. I didn't see anyone as much as I'd have liked. It was rushed and hurried and unsatisfactory. Next summer we have a wedding in BC the same weekend as the Clambake (and, contrary to my hopes articulated in my last post, the day AFTER the last day of school). I don't know yet what we'll be wanting to do next summer, where we will be, where our stuff will be, where C's job will be, or anything else. So predicting much of anything at this point is decidedly premature. However, I will remember this. Since fall will definitely find us in our old house in Seattle again, I think we can work it out so we don't have to rush our visits. I hope so.

    Okay. Time for wrapping up. C would like access to the Internet as well, I think. If nothing else as an excuse to stop switching channels. And I need to get to bed. Packing up tomorrow for a car ride south. One more night away from home...

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June 25, 2009

    Helluva crappy day, but only kinda. I hate this stupidity I go through. I can see myself clearly feeling like garbage and know that it's not real, that I didn't have a good enough breakfast and my hormones are speaking louder than normal this time of month. I can hear myself wondering the wackiest things and know that they too are a product of very temporary chemicals while I wait for lunch and sanity to kick in. I don't really believe in the sadness; it's so exaggerated and fake. There's a part of me watching myself that is strong and secure, sure of herself and her value. So what's the point of giving the shadows a voice here? Maybe I won't after all.
    We leave in a week for vacation. Next year I would like to make sure we've got a few days after the end of school before we hop on a plane even though the prices here jump precipitously when the country goes on vacation together. Now I'm still in the thick of goodbyes, class gifts, reports, playdates, homework and kid portfolios. I haven't lifted my head yet to deal with the details of vacationing, even though I know I should have. C hasn't been able to take over because he's been busy with work. Seems like I should be able to handle it all. Since I don't really WANT to handle it all, I skip out on myself and feel guilty about it later. And during. Not useful really.
    I'm tired. Not enough sleep. Not helping C get sleep either. Incoherent. Sorry.

    I was going to.... There are so many sentences that begin that way in my life now. I'm so tired of myself. This isn't what I want. Crap.

    Okay. Try for a bit of coherence. It's Thursday, so my house is clean. I spend a few hours getting it in shape to pay someone else to clean it. Even though she doesn't care to put things back the way they were, doesn't look up, and keeps putting the garbage into the paper recycling bin, it's probably worth it to have a deadline every week where I get the danged dishes done and the house tidied up so she can vacuum, mop and clean our nasty toilets. Even if I do have to hide the sponge I do the dishes with. On the other hand, I've gotten lax about asking for help. C is putting hours and hours at or home doing work, and I've let the struggles to have kids' help be helpful dissuade me from making it mandatory. So except for vacuuming, mopping and cleaning bathrooms, I do it. And the kids don't hear how outrageous it is when they ask why us adults don't do any work when they are asked to wipe the table and sweep the floor after the dinner I cooked and served and cleared away. It's not as though I don't know I'm hurting myself by failing to put the work in right now. Perhaps during the summer, I can establish some better patterns for our family.
    Yesterday at dinner, since I was increasingly frustrated by the kids not even acknowledging me when I speak to them, I tried something completely different. I stopped talking. It was quite peaceful for me, but it didn't work perfectly. I wasn't completely consistent and wasn't patient enough. I learned that I should definitely spend more time physically directing them or their attention. A wanted to make me talk and asked questions; he didn't really understand. B was still fighting being grumpy and cross by the time I kissed them goodnight; I had hoped my silence would encourage him to talk, but it didn't happen last night at least. Still, it was different, and they were somewhat more attuned to me. It doesn't seem to have translated into perfect listening skills, but that's not any surprise.

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June 14, 2009
tags:

    Lots to cover, still more to do.
    I've entered into the age of badges (Go ahead, I'll wait for it to finish in your head. "... no stinkin' badges!"). I've been sewing on quite a few of late. I got to the bottom of the pile of hand-mending today by sewing on the kids' frog and duck badges on each of their towels, which they earned in swimming last week. A will start Cub Scouts on Thursday, so there are a few more badges coming, just to get his shirt looking as official as his brother's. I repaired a shoe, two sweaters, a slipper, and also sewed the lining in the arms of a suit jacket I took over from my father's closet years ago. It had a hand-tailored label inside one of the pockets that dated it to April 27, 1967. I look at my closets and instead of feeling out of fashion (though I certainly am that!), I feel some pride in how long my clothes last and am impressed by how many years I've worn this shirt, that sweater, or those shoes. Given my predilection for shopping at second-hand stores and the median age of my clothes, there's not a lot of energy going into the manufacture of stuff for me to wear. Good thing, since I'm using more than my fair share of energy for flying around the world.
    Our family has said it's most significant goodbye to date in our tenure here. A's best friend, J, and his sister and parents are all moving to New York tomorrow. I will miss them, especially J's mom, who is very good at some of the things I'm not - talking to people and linking them up together, going out and doing things, being comfortable (or at least offhand) in situations I find stressful because they're new. I admire her and wish her the best of luck transitioning back to the US, and into a new career (medicine, after full-time mom and part-time student here, which followed a surgical career in her life before). There seems to be a trend in my cohort with changing careers, or re-examining values and directions, or returning to the work-force after dedicating years to children. Even C wonders about going back to grad school in odd moments once we return to the States. And I read articles in the expat magazine for partners that I receive and ponder how I'll phrase my experiences here on the next resume I write for myself. The end of our expat lives feels closer now, since we are approaching the end of the school year (three more weeks) and there are so many people leaving school this year (partly as a result of the Nike restructuring since that company is such a big presence here). I look at the goodbye parties and photo books being organized and realize we will be going through that next year. In some ways it feels like we're running out of time. As though there is homework due that I've been putting off. Yet there isn't really. And this weekend I have actually been pretty productive.
    In addition to the hand-mending, I also finished all of the book repair I had in a pile from the school. And I've finished the cataloguing in the library (I think I catalogued, described and tagged around 6000 titles) so there are only a few projects still to complete in the library before I'll feel quite satisfied to work on other things and not go into the library hardly at all. Yesterday I made strawberry jam. Today I got my zucchini starts in pots. And I've picked up following Avondvierdaagse with long walks with the dog. He's happier and it's good for me. I'll get back to running instead of walking, but if I can first tackle the consistency issue, then the runs will follow. I like running too much, though balancing the speed I'd like to run against the dog's need to get exercise, means that sometimes I will need to run as well as walk with him just so I don't feel guilty. He's getting older (13 now), but he's not ready to stay home, even if he is creaky getting back into the car after the 10K. I told the kids we'd get him a dog tag "medal" for the three Avondvierdaagse he will have gone on after the first week of June next year. B was proud to get his second medal and A his first official one. They really didn't like having their days filled with school, then activity (like art), then a quick dinner, and the walk, then home in time only for bed. Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday were 5K and Thursday was the 10K. Friday we were able to go to school an hour later (given that we were still walking at the time the kids usually go to bed Thursday, it was a very good thing), and they received their medals. Thursday is the fancy-dress portion of the walk, so I got colorful leis for all four of us. A left his in the car, but it was helpful to have B drift through the rest of the group (all dressed in the same green polos) with an identifying mark so I could keep some kind of track of him. The dog got a lot of positive comments and smiles as we walked along the streets since I strung his lei along his pack (which he wore all four nights as a signal that we were going on a long walk and so he could carry his own water dish). The kids were all hyped up on the candy they acquired along the route - yeesh! No wonder we don't give them that crap more often. They were worse beggars than the dog, who could smell that I had treats in my pocket for him.
    I'm going to try to do some more catching up here tomorrow, but I need to get C and I to bed now.

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April 28, 2009
tags: anthropology, meteorology, chronology

    I'm in France at the moment. Paris. This may turn into a shorter post than I intend simply because we have plans for today (Jardin d'Acclimatation) and both boys are up and wanting to use our internet connection. Ah well, we'll get where we can and continue later.
    Even when it's only been a few months, I still find to be a surprise the relief of understanding the language being spoken around me. I revel in piercing the curtain of understanding random metro conversations and find it very difficult to respond to A, B, or C in English rather than French. I find French to be a more beautiful-sounding language than Dutch, and miss the cadences and silent consonants I knew so well and can still find in my head these many years later.
    It was a good time to leave the Netherlands, as just a few days ago I had a very typical Dutch experience at a store. I'll illuminate. B went to Bart Smit with C on Saturday because he had a birthday party later that day. While there, he bought two presents, one for Saturday's birthday and another for Sunday's birthday party. Once home, I reminded him that he had already promised to contribute money towards a bigger gift with other friends, and he immediately regretted the purchase. He and C both stressed to me that it had to be returned on Monday if I wanted money back (as it was a Wii game). So, I went to Bart Smit on Monday with game (in their wrapping paper) and receipt in hand. Where I was told that I couldn't return it for money as it had been two days. I countered that they weren't open on Sunday. However, they had been open for four hours on THIS particular Sunday (likely because of the crowds about for the Nike Hilversum run), so it WAS two days and those were the rules. I actually find it difficult to write about this without trying to interject the word "sorry," but that was definitely not ever uttered by the two women facing me at the store. They sealed the now unwrapped game and the receipt in a bag and allowed that I could exchange it for another game within another 12 days (some of which they would be closed), and that was it. I was left in a completely powerless fury. Had I known that the employee who sold it to B and C had expressly said "Monday" as the money-back deadline, I would have pushed harder and insisted on my money. Even so, I'm not sure I would have been successful. Rules are rules. Nobody is sorry. The employees don't care if you ever shop there again. Heck, it would make their job easier if they don't have to deal with you. Very Dutch. It makes me homesick.
    This was ironically just a few days after a conversation with C in which he asked if I'd rather go back at the end of this school year instead of the end of next. I thought about it and realized that my stock answer of "I'm ready to move back at any time," wasn't accurate. I realized that I would rather stay as long as we committed to, that there are things I'd like to do here and people and projects I/we have committed to that I can't drop as easily as I'd imagined. Wow. So, we're almost certainly here in Europe for most of the 70 weeks until school starts in Seattle. If'n you're coming to visit (please do!), it's unlikely that you'll get here when we're not.
    We are still working out the details for future travel plans, specifically this summer. Since Italy with old friends isn't going to happen this year, we're deciding what to do instead. We should have something relatively soon (or we'll be one of those 30 people per day calling kennels looking for a spot). Six weeks isn't a lot of time when you're used to US summers, C wants to take a full 3 weeks of vacation and such things are much more common and sanctioned here where everyone has the same vacation, and there are lots of places we want to go, and many people and plans to try and meet.
    We tried to do our Eiffel Tower visit during the nice day while we are here, but the weather moved through faster than it was forecast, and though it was sunny when we set out for the metro, it was raining and slick by the time we came down the many stairs. It was lit up as we headed back to the metro, but it is too late in the year for us to see the sparkle and have the kids in bed before meltdown. It was nevertheless the kids' favorite thing, beating out such things as using my computer, neglecting to return to the trampolines in the Tuilleries, and walking to museums that were closed on Mondays. It is spring weather in earnest here with gray skies and damp pavements, so it is unlikely we will be using all the shorts and short-sleeves we brought for the week.
    All right, the strife has come to a head and I'm not able to continue until later. The application of food is needed.

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Enjoyable
I find your blogs very enjoyable. You are talented in painting a scene for action and your pattern of thinking. Thanks for letting me inside your mind.
I love you much,
(mom, 5/31/09)

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April 8, 2009
tags: chronology

    I certainly hadn't intended to fall into a pattern of updating this blog only every month, though that has been my regularity for most of this year so far. I'm not sure where the future will take me, so I won't make any promises here, or even in my head. I have been writing with more regularity than you see here, though my e-mail box is still somewhat of a black hole. I read my mail, but then it joins this sink-hole that I dread falling into because it is so overwhelming. I have visions of pulling myself through it and out the other side, but I don't always have the strength to make the vision happen. And then there are the other things that make it hard for me to attack things with single-minded purpose. This morning I spent fruitlessly looking for my keys. My newly repaired/returned Palm has big, though different, problems that I need to address through some customer service means. I spent all of Saturday doing our finances and discovered yesterday that the Netherlands Post will not courier checks. We were able to avoid having to go in to Amsterdam to use DHL, UPS, or the like by C's clever use of the telephone and our luck in having paid them by check last year already, but it still took me time to deal with two post-offices, unhelpful folk and rules, and a learning curve that will never straighten out consisting of things that will never again be relevant. Frustrating.
    I saw a physiotherapist for my hip three times and it's much better now. There is a lot more hidden value in stretching than I realized when I was younger and more limber. Then I bruised my foot by kicking a doorframe in anger; that's nearly all healed now too. The weather is springy and we're awash in the blossoms and blooms that make this feel most like Seattle to me than any other season. Cherry, plum, forsythia, daffodils, pansies, tulips, Oregon grape, rhododendron, azalea, periwinkle... The peas I planted are growing and we've had some gorgeous weather. Of course, it's drizzly now, but that's part of spring too. Saturday last I uncovered a hedgehog in our garden. It was sleeping (or perhaps hibernating, though its breathing seemed more regular than that) and curled into a ball. I called the family over and took some pictures before covering it back up. Somehow a hedgehog seems somewhat cute and cuddly to me, perhaps because they aren't native to America, and likely also due to representation in various books by Dick King-Smith and kid shows like Kipper and Bob the Builder. When I mentioned this to an English mum, she said that their digging for worms and beetles and things are good for aerating the soil, but that she thinks of them as big flea carriers rather than cuddly. Ah well, I suspect we all romanticize the unknown to some extent. Porcupines to me are tree-damaging pests who can kill your dog with ill-placed spines, but I'm still thrilled to have a hedgehog living in our garden.
    B started Scouts, loves it, and has been to an overnight camp already; A has been told he can join once he's seven after the summer break, but there is a long waiting list and a full troop. Both of them had their first art class on Tuesday and are excited about what they're learning. The kids are about at capacity for their activities, though I still mean to add Dutch lessons to their dance cards. Certainly they are busier with outside activities and opportunities than they were a year ago, when they had none. I think it is good for them and they seem happy as well. They just moved up another level in swimming and B was telling me he thinks he got 98% right. I was writing rather than watching so I'm not sure what he means, but I suspect we're likely to come home with a "diploma" or two before we leave. [There are different levels of swimming proficiency handed out here A, B and C diplomas, etc., but the trials for these diplomas happen at set times and with proud parents in the audience.] B passed up an opportunity to explore rugby because he doesn't like tackling or getting hurt in games, and not because he didn't have time. Still, I do hear complaints on the busiest days; sometimes they just want to be at home and play on the computer, or play chalk wars outside.
    I made a realization a week or two ago that there wasn't anything I was doing that I felt like I could or should cut out. That included reading time, which is not always something I feel good about doing. At the time, this realization felt good. Suddenly there wasn't anything I was doing that I didn't want to do, I thought. It meant that all that I was doing, all the choices I was making with how to spend my time, were choices between "good" things. (By now, I've realized that there are a whole passel of things I do that I don't really want to do, or wish I could do more efficiently but am prevented.) Having nothing left I felt should be cut out also meant, however, that I was at my limit for how much I could really do. Which, to someone who chronically overestimates how much she can do and underestimates how long things will take, is quite a blow. There was no more "Theoretically, if I don't spend any more time playing solitaire, I can tag all 11,000 photos!" nonsense to delude myself with. I am in fact making progress with the photos, it's just that time spent doing any one thing means I'm not spending time doing all the other things. I don't at all begrudge the time spent mothering. I just hope that my friends and family understand that I do have another very important role to play.
    Speaking of which...

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hedgehogs
I think they are cute too.
(Kirk, 4/9/09)

mothering
I very much admire your mothering of MY grandsons. Thank You ! Hey there, Happy Easter—new starts, growth, forgiveness and all that !
I love you much,
(mom, 4/13/09)

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March 9, 2009
tags: chronology

    I live in a house packed more with plans than real things. Or at least the plans have become physical things with weight and substance of their own. But I am aware that their weight is something mostly I can feel. My kids live with invisible ghosts, and live without all those things I plan for them but don't quite do. The memories of things that didn't happen but should have aren't actual memories, but longings at the most. I try to stretch myself backwards and forwards to this present to be with them, making memories with what is here, what we have. It's hard though; I keep walking around my plans, unable to keep a straight course and simply walk through them. Will they know how little I was sometimes here for them when I was here? Will it be a surprise when they are older and finding out how different life is in other families? Will they resolve to be different? Make their own plans and intentions so real as to become their own weighty ghosts?
    I picture myself living back in Seattle and know that this feeling of being apart and alone is not unique to this place or this experience. I've felt the same way before, even in my home. All my homes. Having friends, family and the familiar doesn't mean that I will reach out and ask for help, or articulate what's wrong. I end up saying things like today: "I miss the ocean. I caused A to miss a friend's birthday party yesterday for the second time in two weekends. C is gone until Wednesday night." While true, it's inadequate. How do we say anything real to explain our tears? It's not possible to put all of it into words. More words would go perhaps like this: I just finished a sad, beautiful novel by Barbara Kingsolver. I can't find the right foods so I'm either eating not enough or I'm not enjoying my food and just hoping it will help. I can't run without pain and it's there when I walk as well, at a time when the kids want to travel in the jogger. Knowing that I've been in this hormonal soup before and that it will cycle off and the same ghosts and plans will stop being immovable objects and instead companions or conquerable steps... It helps, immensely. I think I can feel the edges of other people's pain by just imagining feeling like this all the time. At least I know that feeling happy and blessed and contented is around the corner, perhaps a sunny square on my black comforter, or finishing homework without a struggle, or a good breakfast.
    Even when I long for home, miss the ocean and the people and the language, I know that the same longing isn't unique to here. I know that what I can do, wherever I am, is make our home. Create this life and make memories by living in it. Things aren't going to be all better when fill in the blank. Life is what we do while we're making our way through time, not the reward we get when we've gotten to the end. So. Time to make some home. Tonight that's dinner and brownies, books and homework, another chapter of The High King and then more writing for me. Ordering a stopgap organizer so I can revert back to calendars that remind me of birthday parties with alarms. Defrosting a turkey. Laundry. There's time enough.

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I miss the wild spaces
(Kirk, 3/12/09)

Are you rather “caught” in the prison of having to keep this blog up? Would you rather simply correspond with individuals who care enough to write a personal e-mail to you?
(mom, 3/16/09)

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February 28, 2009
tags: anthropology, biology, meteorology, pathology, chronology

    Well, I knew it was a long time since I've logged on here, but I didn't really realize it was quite as long as it was. Good thing C keeps his own blog to let you know we're still alive and kicking about.
    Our vacation to Florida was very nice. It was a hard one to come back from. Not so much the leaving as the coming back. The one time I got to dozing on the plane, A asked (again) "How long till we get there?" so a lot of that was being tired. And it's been a hard week for C at work and at home working on work, so I've felt much on my own. I'm still determined to use our time here as well as we can, but any time C is ready to move back, I'm ready too.
    I hadn't been to Florida before so I was surprised at the similarities to the Netherlands: near sea level, flat, watery, canals, cows.... There were a lot of dissimilarities, of course, as well. Florida is sunny and warm in February as well as American being the chief ones. When we first touched down it took a while before I realized I could read the words on the sides of the trucks moving around the airport. Oh, yeah. And it was a relief to be able to make the random comments to strangers I like to when I'm running, or just out and about. If I were to say, "beautiful dog" or "cute hat" or "zoom!" or whatever to folks here in Holland, they would have to parse what I said because it wasn't their first language, perhaps ask me what I said, and the likely misunderstanding is just not worth the trouble. So I suppress it. I don't get to be as friendly here and it was a relief to let myself do more than just smile and give the appropriate time of day greeting. Palm trees, crocodiles, squirrels, manatees... It's a good thing there aren't crocodiles in the Netherlands because it would seriously cut down on the canal skating...
    We had a very relaxing time in Florida. We played a lot of games (Don't Stop, Sequence, Euchre, Clue, and Stop, Thief!) and took a bunch of pictures. We went to the beach a few times, celebrated a late Christmas, visited Disney World, went to the Brevard Zoo, toured some parts of Harbor Branch where a brother-in-law works, celebrated Valentine's Day, and spent a lot of time with family, the newest member we hadn't met before. The kids really enjoyed boogie boarding and playing in the surf. It wasn't too hot or too cold and it was nice to go running with C in the mornings, something we haven't done together since the kids stopped being content being pushed in the jogger.
    We're back to snowdrops and rain, jackets and scarves. The forsythia and daffodils have yet to bloom, but I bought some seeds to plant in the next week. About time to take down the snowflakes from our window and look towards spring.

    The week we left for vacation, I had a rather troubling incident with another mom from the school. At swimming, she knocked against my foot and then exploded at me telling me that she'd like to kill me, insisting that I knew what she was talking about, and refusing to tell me what it was about beyond some vague references to talking about her behind her back and laughing at her children being hurt. I continued to calmly but earnestly try to find out what she was angry and upset about until she said she didn't want to talk about it anymore, I said whenever you're ready I'm available and she left. The next day at school, when I approached her again, to tell her I had spent a lot of time trying to figure out what this was all about, she cut me off and accused me of being sarcastic, again said she wanted to kill me, was ready to kill someone, and went on somewhat incoherently about how I was acting, talking to her at swimming only because I wanted something, and repeated again and again that this was a school, an international school. After she ran out of steam and again ended the conversation by saying she didn't want to talk anymore, she left. Once she was safely away, I burst into tears. Some other moms suggested I not make it my problem and suggested that this was something she just did, that I not worry about it because she was crazy. I couldn't just blow it off. I've spent a lot of mental energy on this rehashing the events, rehearsing what I'd like to say, composing phantom e-mails, and trying to figure it out. I did tell the school about the incident before I left. The one time I uttered her name "behind her back" was when another mom asked if I knew who she was. I said yes, that's ______, she's from ----, she has two boys >>> and >>> and they go swimming with us. Other mom said, she just yelled at me; I think she has me mixed up with someone else.   After which, I think we dropped it and probably laughed about something or other else. I can only imagine that my attacker saw or overheard part of this conversation and imagined something different. Certainly I never saw her children get hurt, let alone laughed about it. Like I said, I haven't been able to blow this off. I didn't think about it too much on vacation, but coming back to it wasn't a party. Fortunately, there hasn't been anything further. Since she was the one to back off and end the conversation both times, I have felt more self-conscious, but haven't changed my behavior at the school much. I've greeted her when I could, though she seems to be avoiding me. I'm trying not to make it too much my problem, though clearly not entirely successfully. I do hope she gets some help for whatever problems she is having, and I hope that her children don't suffer too much.

    I've gotten back to notebook writing. It's been very good for me. Although there is some repetition with things I'd like to write here, the pressure is off to edit myself. I can name names in a way I can't here. I can talk about how I'm feeling without imagining parents and other audiences. Nobody has ever suggested that the only writing I do be a blog entry or an e-mail, but that has happened for too many long stretches of time in the past year, so this return to my writing roots is a good thing. I can't promise more frequent updates to the blog, but honestly, since I feel better when I write and I have a guilt-free channel back to do that in, I don't particularly care. You'll survive. Heck, there are a couple of friends' blogs I still check that haven't been updated in about a year.

    What else? I'm probably going to take some sort of photography class soon. I'm in the W's in cataloguing books at the school library. I've got pain in a sciatic nerve (or something similar) on my left side that hasn't gone away in a week. A has been fighting a fever again and missed the voetbal game today, though B played well and their team is actually off to a 2-0 start since Christmas break. Their drama class is putting on a play next week. B has escaped the wait list for Scouts and will start this coming Thursday evening. A will be a paleontologist in his upcoming job fair and B just finished a presentation on the history of numbers. I have nearly six pounds of dried Just Peas in my freezer, and I've replaced all of our very annoying cabinetry hardware with handles that don't come off in your hand. C is working on a super secret project that involves lots of late evenings at work, and phone calls here at home. One of the Albert Heijn supermarkets has recently started a trial opening on Sunday afternoons. And we've started working with a housekeeper (though she's been back in Poland the last three weeks). The kids keep losing baby teeth, and they both still need a haircut. I've got a bunch of pictures to wrangle, so I'm going to go do that.

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January 23, 2009
tags: anthropology, natology, chronology

    Friday again. I'm looking forward to seeing more of C. A combination of late work nights, poor choices, and missed opportunities has meant we've not quite connected as well as we'd like. We've all been some degree of sick over the past two weeks. I spent a week getting more sleep than usual, so I've avoided the worst of it, I think, though it's not necessarily over yet. A came to our bed last night about 2:00 sounding really sick with coughs and a full nose. I gave him meds and C and I planned for him to stay home from school today. We didn't tell A, though, and he got dressed and said he was well enough to go to school when he woke up. He did sound much better, though we dosed him again before he left.
    I made the arrangements for the dog and cat to be cared for during our vacation in February. We also just received a reservation form from the dierenpension for the months of July and August. So, clearly we need to get our butts in gear and figure out what we're doing this summer and when. There's the prospect of Seattle/Spokane as we did last year, there's the possibility we were to plan for of Italy with M&B&M&B, there's a house-swap potential, and since our summer is crammed into six weeks between school being out (July 3) and starting up again (August 17), we should definitely use it all to our best advantage.
    I wasn't smart enough to watch the inauguration in real time (though I caught some of the cavalcade and Senate lunch), but viewing his speech wasn't a problem in this digital age. Obama's election really has made a difference in my comfort in being recognized as an American overseas. Back when I was a college student in France there were those that sewed Canadian flags to their backpacks to avoid being the Ugly American, and we were extraordinarily proud when Italians thought we were French (and not just because it said something about our language proficiency). In Dutch (as in our own language) the word for English people is the same as for the English language: Engels. Usually context suggests that the language is being inquired about rather than country of origin. I could be wrong about the assumptions that fall from that, but perhaps not: C got complimented on his beautiful American accent and was asked where he acquired it. As I mentioned, I wore my American flag sweater the day the election was called, and our family as well as friends and strangers we meet are all excited about Obama becoming our 44th president.

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January 21, 2009
tags: natology, meteorology, chronology

The earth keeps turning. The skies are considerably less dark now during soccer practice than they were before Christmas, and they are liberally filled with geese in deep vees that form and reform according to some goosish logic. The canals are almost completely free of ice and the grass is green instead of white. I've finished with the N's and begun the O's in my quest to nearly single-handedly catalogue all of the picture books in the kids' school library. As of Tuesday, the kids have been bumped up a swimming level and I am impressed with their quick understanding of the breast stroke; mostly they are pleased because class is a bit later allowing them more play on the playground after school. The snow and ice pushed us to taking the jogger back and forth to school for a while. I discovered when school started that I hadn't been biking regularly, and then when running, that I hadn't been doing that with the regularity that I enjoyed last year either. During the break C fixed the tagalong bike so that it doesn't lean so far to the left (I was getting regular comments from concerned strangers on the street) and it should hold us until spring arrives with weather that encourages me to let A ride to school on his own bike instead of behind mine. While the fix has made his every wiggle more of a balancing challenge for me, and because he tends to whine whenever I have B ride in front of me instead of trailing behind, I will be glad to have my bike to myself once again. At the same time, he's not the most traffic-savvy of kids yet, nor physically used to actually propelling his own weight to and from school, and his desire to be ahead of his brother on the downhill near home can put my heart in my throat.
Practice didn't last long enough for me to finish this...

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January 5, 2009
tags: anthropology, meteorology, chronology

It's cold here. It always amazes me the things that people build that aren't designed for the climates they're in. Mom says there are roofs collapsing in Spokane. C and I have purchased new windows for our home in three different houses because it was important to us and made such a difference in our home's ability to retain its heat and keep the cold out. Yet here we are again living in a house with sieves for windows. There are some rooms with double panes. There are also some rooms with serious drafts (and I'm not at the moment counting our mail slot). Some of the lighter snowflakes hanging in our front window swing in the draft from the window cold and the radiator heat beneath that they have to be repositioned on the rod every day. But it's our kitchen and the downstairs bathroom that are the worst. I shake my head in amazement when I see our neighbors open their windows in this weather, and there does seem to be some Dutch reliance on fresh, outside air in all kinds of weather that I don't quite understand. So, it is possible that this house WAS built for its climate given that its weather happens in a particular culture. But still... Brrrr!

C and I had a nice date night. In addition to vowing to do such things more often, we had a nice dinner and then played computer games until an embarrassing time in the morning. We then vowed not to stay up so late again. Now it's Monday and the kids are back at school and C is back at work. I am having a productive day so far, and will need to go soon to pick up kids and bring them home. I'm feeling full of energy, confidence and ability, and though I'm sure some of it is just my cyclic nature, I think our hitting the one year mark here and my week in the States helped re-charge my batteries as well. I'm conscious of our return date on the horizon (still by September 2010), and there's nothing like a deadline to sharpen one's focus. Oop; got to go...

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January 2, 2009
tags: anthropology, chronology

    We've been here for a year now. It's our anniversary as well as the turning of the year. Reflections and resolutions are supposed to be the order of the day. Instead I've got A asking me every few minutes how long until their playdate sleep-over (and our date night), and my attempts to get him involved in other things while waiting result in his asking for my further involvement. Pleeeeease, mommy? Finally, we played that connection game where the kids and I look into each others' eyes and try to keep from smiling or laughing. Though I am actually very good at not laughing, I find that we connect better and things work more smoothly if I instead try to get them to laugh by laughing myself and "lose" the game.
    Time has played the tricks it usually does by pretending to be linear when our experience of it is so decidedly stretchy and relative. One year. Last year I was cold in this house and that hasn't changed much, though I'm better prepared and clothed for it. The house still has a large open mail slot, windows that seem to breathe, and wood or tile floors that seep cold, but now I have any number of slippers, and my long silk underwear to layer on underneath. The coldest days, when I'm unwilling to turn the heat up any more, I borrow the kids' superhero/villian gloves. It's a bit warmer today, though, and the hole in the ice over the bubbler on the pond next door is a bit wider. People have been throwing rocks and stumps onto the ice on the canals to test the thickness and so they sit out there in a spray of dirt on the ice waiting for a thaw to let them through to the bottom. Perhaps there will be skating on the canals this year.
    Last year we were uncertain of many things. We know a lot more this year about how things work and the things we need to do. Some things remain mysterious, but not because we're foreigners, like why Albert Heijn, the major grocery store we visit, has a "Hamster Week" promotion this time of year. There won't be the same time spent finding things this year that took up so many hours. We've gotten into some grooves (though we seem unable to get anywhere close to a regular schedule). I'd like to turn those grooves into getting more fun things done with my kids and while they're in school. I'd like this to be a very good year, and am hopeful that we can get there from here.
    Now the kids are gone and my C is waiting. I'm unlikely to get much more writing done this afternoon or evening, so I will bid adieu. Happy New Year!

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